


Of Cats and Cats

by Neolin



Category: Lamento -BEYOND THE VOID-
Genre: Drama, M/M, Romance, Trauma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-01
Updated: 2019-11-20
Packaged: 2020-05-31 16:06:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 23,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19429426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neolin/pseuds/Neolin
Summary: Konoe woke up with no memory and he is being persecuted. He needs to know why.





	1. Chapter 1

Konoe woke up with a throbbing, murderous headache. His head was a scrambled mess. His eyes cannot focus. There is a hazy ring around the corner of his eyes, rendering his peripheral vision useless. His head pound again, this time a sharp against the dull ebbing pain. Konoe placed a hand on the right side of his head, rubbing, but everyone knows that rubbing your head will do nothing. He sat up, resting his left hand on the soft mattress and tug? He looked down and saw wires. Strings? Tubes?

What are these? Konoe frustrated pulled on the strings that latched on to his arm. He winced in pain. He looked closely and saw a glint on the end of the strings, a needle? What is this?

A wave of nausea rolled over his head. His vision blurred away and Konoe gave himself a hard shake in the head. Okay. This is not good. What did he do last night? And where is he right now? He looked around squinting. He can see nothing, blurred edges at best, but nowhere in his life does he remember anything in this room. Everything here is downright unfamiliar, from the positions of the shelves to the desk, to the potted plants on the window sill. Unfamiliar. He needs to go.

He needs to leave this place. He knows this much, he needs to go back. . . go back to. . . to where?

Konoe sat up straight, suddenly feeling extra sober. That's right to where? Where was he going to return to? How come he has no memory of anything? When he tried to focus, he was met with another pang in the head. His head is blank and he could feel panic rising up his chest.

W-wait. How come he can't remember anything?

The harder he tries, the foggier his head becomes and the more it aches. Damn. It hurts. So. bad. It feels like his head is being crushed together from both sides by a giant clamp.

The door swayed opened.

Konoe's head shot up. A white cat. A sudden buzz flashed through his head. He saw white. White coats. White masks. Then, pain. Konoe shook his head again, trying to do the pain away, but the shaking did nothing to relieve his pain. However, he knows the white cat is dangerous. His guts are telling him so.

"How are you feeling?"

Konoe saw the cat say something, narrowing his eyes at his lips. But, he didn't catch it. His senses are clouded. However, he did see a hand coming towards him and he isn't sure why, but he freaked out. Those looming hands were large, dark and they were there to catch him. To tie him up. To lock him up. So he couldn't move. Couldn't see.

No.

Before he understands what he was doing, he pushed pass the white cat, through the door and left the room. He ran searching for the exit and he found it easily. He left the cabin running. Running for his life.

For as long as he could remember, he was running. Suddenly, his legs gave and he came crashing into dirt. He pushed himself up and saw dark spots appearing against the dusty ground. Sweat were dripping down his face. He didn't even realize how tired he was until he could finally hear it in his voice. Ragged. Raspy. He was gasping for air. He swallowed a lump of saliva and then pushed himself up with great difficulty. His hand immediately clasped onto a nearby tree.

Okay. He needs to take a breath and rest. He stood for a bit, then whipped his head back. He saw nothing moving. He focused his ears. Nothing. Okay good. That cat hasn't caught up yet. Okay. Okay. Just a bit.

He allowed himself to slide down the tree and sat on the base.

Now what? What he is going to do? He doesn't know this forest. He doesn't where he is. What county is this? And then his heart sank when he found out that he doesn't even remember the counties. For the Creator's sake, he doesn't even remember the continent's name. He bit his lips. Okay, maybe something else. He tried. Actually tried to remember. And he found out he knew nothing. Blank. Slate.

What the heck?

He winced when another sudden pain attacked him from nowhere. Fine. He'll deal with it later. Right now, he has to make sure that cat won't catch up with him. He needs to go way out, farther. So, he began walking. Walking. Walking. And walking.

He walked in the forest for a long time. Maybe a quarter of the day, the sun traveled across the sky, slanting the shadows of the trees. He walked for so long, yet there are no signs of civilizations. No villages. No rivers. At least if he found a river, he'll be able to walk along it and eventually find a settlement.

He wasn't doing very good. He was growing very thirsty. Tired. He swallowed. Once, he swallowed saliva. But now, nothing. His throat hurts when he swallowed. His mouth was dry. His headache was not doing him very good either. It was no longer jumping at him like a feral cat, instead, a dull pain panging at the back of his head.

Suddenly, he can hear crunching. He froze. His ears all on alert. Is it the white cat? No. There were two distinct crunches. Who? He immediately ran to a nearby tree. The crunching stopped. He waited. His heart was pounding at this chest. Why did it stop? Konoe pressed his back against the tree and slowly exhaled a breath of air that he didn't realize he was holding. Then he leaned over a bit and eyed at the spot he last heard crunching. There was a shadow. Instantly, he pulled back. Blood drained from his face. Okay. Who? What do they want from him? He is certain that the figure over there is looking for him because it stopped moving the moment he stopped moving.

Panic filled his head. He doesn't know what to do. If he run, he isn't sure if he can outrun the other in this sad state of his. If he stays here, they will just eventually find him. The leaves rustled. His eyes darted up.

"Found you," a cheery voice sing-sang. A shadow dropped from the tree and landed expertly on their leg. When the figure stood, they were taller than Konoe and they were looming. It was a black-spotted cat and he seemed very happy. Very happy. A creepy smile spread across his face from ear to ear. A chill shot up Konoe's spine, all the hair on his body stood. The cat in front of him is not the white cat, but he knows a threat when he sees one. He needs to go. Right now.

He felt his back leave the trunk, his foot grit firmly on the ground, his body ready for a sprint. But the moment he turned, he felt the world shift and he face-planted into leaves. Pain traveled up his spine.

"Didn't your father teach you not to turn your back from a battle? HUH?" The cat threatened with a snarl.

Konoe tried to pull free from the death grip on his tail, but the tail just pulled back and he winced in pain.

A low, bubbling laugh reached his ears from behind.

"You have no idea how happy I was to see this," the cat said, mockery in voice. He gave his tail a harsh squeeze as to emphasize a point.

The cat turned his head, eyes away.

"Hey, can you believe it? We did it. Told ya' it's worth to travel here today."

Konoe took this as a chance to get away. He twisted his body, claws drawn and swung a heavy swipe at the guy's hand and earned a pained howl.

"You shitty brat!"

Konoe dashed just in time to avoid the swing of an arm that was headed his direction. Then he just ran. His headache forgotten in that instant, fueled by adrenaline. He was very fast for being in the state he was in, it caught those two creeps off guard, but there is a limit to his abilities and the headache returned. Suddenly, with a loud painful pang, his knees were forced to the ground. He didn't even get the change to retaliate before he saw a glint in the corner of his eyes. It is flying towards him. He clamped his eyes shut.

Clang.

His eyes snapped open saw sword swirling uselessly on ground.

"Are you trying to kill him, Lenn?"

"Of course not! I just didn't expect him to drop suddenly."

"Really? This is why you should be on the watch out while I chase. You are way too clumsy."

"What did you say asshole?"

"I'm saying you are too clumsy. If you took his life, there is nothing you can do to make up for it."

"Are you calling me incompetent?"

Konoe sat there, staring emptily at the scene playing before him. They are arguing. What is going on? He was just sitting there idly, until he realized this is the perfect chance to get away. He sat up slowly and back stepped into the dense foliage behind him. Once he was out of sight, he turned around and ran. A million of thoughts ran through his head at the same time. Why are they arguing? Why are there cats chasing him? And they mentioned not killing him. Why? What did he do to provoke dangerous cats like those? Just in time, a sharp pain stabs him at the side of his head. He was forced to stop, caught on a tree to stop himself from falling.

Then, the headache came back at him at full force. His stomach acid threatens to ride up his throat. A wave of anxiety came crashing at him. This is just great. His vision is blurring out again. His hearing muffled. It feels like the world took a step back from him. It was so bad that he didn't hear crunching behind him.

Konoe hissed out in pain when he felt a harsh tug on his hair. He struggled against it kicked, scratched, squirmed but to no avail. The sky started spinning. The cat jerked his head back and spat words into his face, but it sounded so far away. Konoe didn't catch anything. Instead, he tried pulling forward, but the hand in his head gripped tighter and he snapped back crying. So he stopped. It was like his head was pinned. He couldn't move. He couldn't do anything.

Sounds are traveling past him like the rush of a fast current. He is submerged under water. His whole world is a blur.

Then he opened his eyes to wooden ceiling. He sprung up from the bed, eyes darting everywhere. Shelves, books, chair, table, pots. What? Why is he here?

A book clasped shut.

Konoe's eyes flew to his right. White cat.

The white cat look at him.

"Calm down."

Calm down? He is already calm?

The cat pointed down. And then, did he saw the mess he created. Feather spurted out everywhere. Ripped pillows, ripped sheets. It looked like a crime scene. His claws were out. He didn't even notice.

"I'm not going to hurt you."

His eyes sprung back to the white cat's face. He studied the cat's expression slowly, trying to catch anything that reeked of a lie. But he found nothing.

"What is your name?"

His name? His name is -. What was his name again?

Blank.

His mouth gaped open, h-he doesn't remember. This is getting bad to the point that it is not even funny. Everything feels like a bad joke.

The cat must have caught the message because he just sat up, walked across the room and returned with a cup in his hand.

"Here, drink."

Konoe accepted it. I don't know what to do.

He has been caught up with fight or flight so far. The goal was always clear to him, he knows what he should be doing, which was running for his life. But now that he knows he isn't in immediate danger, the goal suddenly becomes unclear. He has nowhere to go. Heck, he doesn't know where he should go. He doesn't know anything.

Once his lips touched the cold rim, he realized just how thirsty he was. Sweet mother earth, his mouth was like the desert. He couldn't pull back and practically downed the whole cup in seconds. The empty cup left him wanting more, but he was embarrassed to ask for more. So he just placed the cup on the table beside him. The white cat, for some reason, understood him and refilled his cup again.

When he drank to his heart's content, he felt one hundred times better, he started to see his environment clearly for once. And he realized that this room must be a study room, there are tons of books and pages scattered across the table and there is a large bookshelf next to the desk that is packed with books. He hasn't realized before — maybe because his senses were clouded, but this room smells exactly like books. It was very apparent and it is very calm-inducing for Konoe. He also sensed another scent mingled with the books, like herbs. He followed his nose to the small table next to him. There is an incense pot on the table that he didn't notice before.

"It is for calming and headaches."

Konoe nodded, gaze still on the incense pot, watching the smoke ride up the air, then he turned his gaze to the stranger.

"Where are-" He croaked. God, he sounds terrible. He cleared his throat a few times.

"What happened to the two cats in the forest?"

The cat heaved a sigh, "They have been dealt with. But, what did you do to piss off someone that badly?"

Konoe gave him a confused look.

"You have a bounty on your head."

What?

Konoe gave him another clueless look. The cat seemed to have caught on because he continued.

"Someone wants you pretty bad, they offered 300 gold for your head. What did you do?"

Konoe is in a shock trance. He could not answer Rai.

"I-I don't know?"

"What do you mean?"

"I honestly don't know."

The cat stared at him.

"I don't remember anything."

Eyes-wide, knitted brows.

"Nothing?"

"Nothing."

"Even your name?"

"Even my name. I don't remember anything, okay? Except for basic things like speaking, cooking, reading I know the basics things okay? I just...don't remember who I am."

Saying it out loud, makes Konoe realize what grave situation he is in. It stunned him to know that he doesn't remember anything. Isn't this pretty serious? What in the world did he do?

The cat sighed, looking defeated.

Konoe peered at him. He looks disappointed. What did he wish to get from Konoe? Konoe doesn't like how he is answering all the questions so it's time he gets to question too.

"What is your name?"

"Rai."

"Okay Rai, what happened? Why am I here?"

"I found you in a rubble. There was a landslide due to the heavy rain this season. The landslide came down on a small northern village. You happened to be in one of the buildings during this event."

"Oh. . ."

Konoe narrowed his eyes on him.

"What?"

"Do you go around saving random cats?"

Rai rolled his eyes.

"No. You just happened to look half-dead on the ground and I don't want you to die on me when I could have done something."

Okay. What a weird guy. But Konoe knows he isn't a bad guy. He is far from being dangerous. Konoe isn't sure why his head was telling him otherwise earlier in the day.

"I-I am sorry for freaking out earlier. I don't know what got to me."

"It's fine."

Konoe nodded, bit his lips, eyes averted.

"Do you think-" Konoe cut himself off.

"What?"

"Do you think I can go to the northern village and see it for myself?"

"No."

Konoe snapped his eyes back to Rai, shocked.

"Why not?"

Rai rolled his eyes.

"Do you want to get your head hunted?"

Oh yeah, he is being targeted by someone, god-knows-who.

"No..." Konoe looked down.

"Exactly."

Konoe is thinking about the whole situation. Trying to piece together information and figure out what has got him here in the first place. He tried again to remember, but nothing comes back except blank. He is feeling pretty dejected. Why can't he remember? Suddenly, Rai spoke up.

"How about coming to Ransen?"

"Where?"

"A city. It is dense enough to hide outlaws. The rule enforcements are not entirely top notch and there are tons of cat that fit the description they used to describe you."

Konoe felt uncertain.

"But maybe..."

Rai comes closer, closing in on Konoe's personal space and Konoe flinched. Anxiety started kicking in, he felt super uncomfortable, ears pressed flat against his head. He saw a hand reaching towards him and he snapped, hissing. Rai withdrew his hand and stopped moving closer, but he didn't back down either.

"Relax, I was just wondering if we should do something about your hair."

My hair?

"Your description calls for a long-haired cat. If your hair is shorter, you wouldn't be recognized that easily."

Oh.

Konoe nodded, agreeing.

The evening sunlight filtered into the window and landed on Rai. Rai's silver hair glowed white against the sun and it was beautiful. For the first time, Konoe came to acknowledge that Rai is indeed good-looking for a cat, and for the first time, he noticed that Rai has striking blue eyes, very pretty blue eyes.

But one of them is gone and an eye patch is in its place.

"...what happened to the other eye."

Rai's eyes snapped to him immediately. The warmth fade away and he could feel his skin pricking. He must have said that aloud. Rai gave him a dark look, his heart started speeding up.

"I-I'm sorry."

He wanted to say more, but he is afraid anymore will just tick Rai even more. So he shut his mouth and stared at the feathery mess on his lap. Why is Rai acting like this? What happened to his eye?

"...forget it."

Konoe didn't catch that.

"What?"

"We should cut your hair."

"Oh..."

"Do you mind me cutting it for you? Or do you want to cut it yourself?"

"I think I'll do it myself."

Konoe still felt uncomfortable with Rai in his personal space.

Rai nodded and handed him scissors.

"Mirror?"

"Sure."

Konoe stared at the familiar reflection. Somehow he is relieved that he at least remembers his own appearance. It is strange that he doesn't remember anything else though. He looks okay. It makes him wonder how he'll look better if he has Rai's eyes. Konoe snips off his hair to a length that he thinks is doable and felt the breeze against his nape.

"Let's go."

"What is Ransen like?"

"City."

Rai didn't say anything else.

Great. He knows Rai is a man of few words, but this is too much. Guess he'll just see for himself.

Neolin here!

Konoe doesn't know his name. But how when all his thoughts contain his name? Well, that is for the sake of convenient reading. Also for writing, because "light brown cat" is too long to type and it is annoying. Plus, we are in third person! I know his name! It's just that he doesn't!

I also don't have a beta so there are bound to be errors. Just tell me I'll fix them.


	2. Cart Ride

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They chat a bit and try to know each other, but Rai is too cool for Konoe.

Rai told him that they will set eyes on Ransen first thing in the morning. It is dangerous to walk in the forest during the night. There could be wild animals. . . beasts, pretty much anything that can be dangerous will be active at night. But worst of all, bounty hunters will take advantage of the night and attack them while they are resting. Rai would rather avoid ambush if he could.

Konoe is really grateful that there is someone who is willing to go out of his way to help him. But he still can't shake off the feeling that the whole situation is too good to be true. Maybe Rai is lying to him and he is being taken advantage of. The thing is, "You just happened to look half-dead on the ground and I don't want you to die on me when I could have done something" doesn't seem like a strong enough reason for Rai to do so much for him. There is a limit to how much kindness a person can offer. The only thing Konoe could get from this is that there is something that Rai wants from him. Is it related to the bounty? Maybe Rai knew something about the bounty despite the cat saying that he doesn't know. However, Konoe cannot bring himself to question Rai about this. And he feels that Rai wouldn't answer him anyway.

In the end, Konoe decides that he should just keep a steady eye at Rai just in case Rai does something funny. However, his ongoing suspicion was returned by kindness. Rai offered him nuts to eat and the whole situation throws him off. One part of his brain says that he needs to be on guard, but the other side tells him to treat Rai normally and stop being so rude. Rai is saying something. When Konoe finally tuned in on the conversation, he heard that Rai is saying that he did not stash away a lot of food in this cabin. He did not expect to stay here for this long. 'You'll have to put up with nuts for now.' Konoe shook his head and told Rai that this is enough and he properly thanked Rai. Rai ate with him and together, they ground on nuts in silence.

Konoe was the first to break the silence with a question.

"Do you live here?"

Silence.

"No."

"What is this place then?"

"My hideout."

Hm.

"Where do you usually live then?"

"Ransen."

Okay.

"How come you were here when you live in Ransen?"

"Stop asking so many questions," Rai spat out in a harsh tone.

Konoe's tail straight up bristled and then they slowly lowered until they were almost flat against the bed.

"I'm sorry."

Rai sighed, "I just happen to have business in the area."

Konoe perked up in interest. Rai gave an opening. He could probably ask another question. However, he has too many questions, like what business do you have and how long was I out from the landslide and why did you really save me? But the opening soon closed when Rai sat up from the bed and trotted to the wall across the room. Rai sat down against the wall with folded legs and propped his head up in the palm of his left hand. With his other hand, he took his large sword and rested it against his shoulder. It looks like Rai doesn't want any more questions.

"Do you want to sleep on the bed?" Konoe asked one last question, feeling guilty that he took the bed.

Silence.

Rai did not even open his eyes. It's like he didn't hear Konoe speak.

"Goodnight," Konoe finally said, giving up.

Konoe could hear a faint grunt.

He leaned towards the candle on his left and blew. Then he plopped down and pulled the blanket over his shoulder and closed his eyes. Sleep came over him quite easily. He was pretty tired.

Konoe was woken up by a light shake on his shoulders. He feels like utter shit. His eyelids are heavy and it feels like his eyeballs have sunken into the back of his socket. To top it off, his headache hasn't completely disappeared. It is way better than yesterday, but he could still feel a dull ache in the back of his head. The room is pretty dim. The sun has just rose and the room is dyed with a dim blue hue. The morning air is chilly and Konoe shivered. He also felt an urgent need to pee.

He kicked the blanket away and sat up. Just sat up. He remained in the position. His body may be awake, but his mind sure isn't, they are still drifting off somewhere in the grand universe. Suddenly, he felt something land on his head. Konoe jolted and quickly pried the thing off. When he pulled it back, he realized it was a cloak.

"Wear it."

Rai didn't say anything else and left the room. When Konoe finally got himself fully awake, both mind and body, he put on the cloak. The smell of books and herbs instantly hit his face. It smells very good. And then he noticed that there is a cup of water next to the bed. Rai probably left it there for him. The little things make Konoe think that Rai is actually very caring. He finished the water and sprang out of bed, hurrying out the cabin to take a piss.

Rai was waiting for him in front of the cabin, a couple of meters away. Konoe ran to the back to deal with his business. When he returned, Rai was still there. The white cat spotted him and then turned around, as though he is expecting Konoe to follow him.

Nonetheless, Konoe caught up to Rai and walked several steps behind. Rai was silent. Konoe felt tensed, but he didn't know what to say. He can't ask Rai any real questions and Rai doesn't seem like the type for small talks. So they walked with their mouths shut.

The chilly morning started to pick up and pushed against his body. It was freezing. Konoe combated this by pulling the hood up and felt a bit better. Plus, he doesn't want anyone to see his face.

They were walking for a while in the dense forest. It has been such 'a while' that Konoe does not mind the silence anymore. Instead, Konoe is concerned with the problem that he has no idea where they are going. From what he's seen, the forest looked exactly the same. How does Rai keep track of things? But then the answer to his question came to him in the next moment. It was a slight change, but he felt something in the air shifted. . . the scent. It went from fresh mountain grass, flowers, water dews to dirt road, smoke and something musky that Konoe wasn't entirely sure what it was. They did eventually made it to a dirt road. As they walked farther, the musky smell grows stronger so did the smoke. When he finally came to a conclusion to what it was, he could already see it in front of his eyes. It was a town. He could smell a lot of things mingled together.

They walked into the town, Konoe a little tensed, scared that someone will recognize him from his bounty. No one is looking at him, really, but Konoe is still nervous. The town was small but lively. There are cats talking and laughing. Everyone seems to be doing something, minding their own business and that soothes Konoe's nerves a bit.

The early morning breeze caught a whiff of something sweet, aromatic and it made Konoe's mouth water. He didn't notice before, but he is feeling hungry. They arrived at a horse stall. Rai said something to the horsekeeper, they nodded. Went in and came out with two horses. Rai nodded and then handed the horsekeeper something and the deal was done.

"Rai."

"Hm?"

"Can we grab something to eat?"

"We are heading there right now. The ride to Ransen takes four days. We need to stock up on supplies before leaving."

Rai bought him to the market place. There are way more cats here than the street before. There is a large variety of food in the market ranging from vegetables to meat. There are also food stalls. Lots and lots of food stalls. If Konoe was drooling before, he is now straight up dripping with hunger. He wants to try everything. However, Rai doesn't seem to be interested in the food stalls. He is more interested in, you know, actual stocking up for their four days trip. Konoe tagged behind him whilst staring longingly at the food stalls.

Konoe didn't pay attention, but he believes that Rai is buying dry foods, like nuts, dried meat, baked goods and then some fresh food like fruits and vegetables. By the time Rai is done, they were carrying so much. The brown bag was full to the brim and Konoe had trouble seeing in front of him. They headed back to the horse stall.

Konoe didn't know before, but Rai actually rented a wagon. It was pretty spacey despite 1/3 of the cart being taken up with two barrels of water and horse feed. They settled the bags next to the barrels and feed.

"Hop on."

They went straight to the road. Rai sat in the driver's seat to control the horses while Konoe sat in the back. Rai then pulled out something and gave it to Konoe. It was hot and smelled incredible. It was a ham and egg wrap. When did he get this? Konoe didn't see Rai buy it. Even so, Konoe shouted thanks and enjoyed the meal. It tastes so good. After the meal. Konoe stared boringly into the forest path behind them. Konoe took a nap unknowingly. He woke up to a sudden jolt of the carriage. They are passing through a small water creek. It was beautiful. Then, the forest turned into the old boring trees again. At this point, Konoe started to juggle the fruits. However, Rai yelled at him to stop. 'You will bruise the fruit.' Konoe ate the one that he did bruise.

Konoe was itching to ask Rai things, but he convinced himself not to because of Rai's obvious reactions. However, he has been telling himself this the whole morning and he was feeling a bit frustrated. He really wants to know.

"Why are you helping me?" He finally asked, somewhat surprised that he actually did.

As expected, Rai did not answer him. Konoe turned around and plopped down on the hard wooden floor with a bored expression on his face. He wished he had gotten himself something to fiddle with. Suddenly, the carriage stopped and his head bonked against the barrels.

"What happened?" Konoe asked, propping himself up with his elbows.

"Break."

There was a lake. The horses drank water. They ate. In silence.

Konoe took the initiative.

"Why are you helping me though?" He pressed again.

"Do you prefer that I don't?"

"I didn't mean it that way...I just...it's just no one will go so far for another cat that they do not know so well."

Rai looked at him for a moment and then continued eating and the conversation did not develop any further. Konoe attempted at more conversation. But Rai did not reply with more than an "Mm" and "Yeah." Konoe gave up. He just watched the lake. The small waterfall at the edge of the lake and the variety of bugs that flew around and hover over the water. Then his eyes flew to the horses. They were munching on the grass next to the river.

The break ended when they finished their food and they immediately continued their journey.

Boredom defined Konoe now. Sometimes he laid down just to feel the vibration on his back. Then he leaned over the back ledge of the cart and watched as dirt picked up from the wheels and left a dusty trail behind. When night came, Rai hopped into the carriage. They ate inside and then they slept against opposite walls. Rai, sleeping the way he did at the inn. Konoe, uncomfortable because half of his space is stolen by Rai. If he lies down, his boots will touch Rai's elbow and he doesn't want that, so he just copied Rai and slept sitting up.

Konoe woke up with neck, shoulder pain. He felt like he didn't sleep at all. How the heck did Rai sleep through that and have the energy to continue with the next day? Must be because he is a fighter.

They continued on the road again.

Konoe continued his adventure of watching the wheels in movement. And a question popped up. It wasn't so small, such as 'Ah, what nice weather' or 'The forest is beautiful', but it wasn't so big that will result on Rai shutting up on him. He thinks it's pretty neutral so he asked.

"Who maintains these roads?"

"No one."

"How come it's cleared of everything then?"

"People just decided to use it and that's all."

"How come we haven't met another traveling wagon so far?"

"The North isn't exactly an exciting place. Those who use this road are usually merchants. But, they all now gathered at Ransen."

"Why?"

"It's almost Spring Festival."

"What's that?"

Silence.

"What's that?" Konoe said again, louder, this time his head poking out from the barrels.

"I heard you."

"Then, answer me."

"What do you remember about the Spring Festival?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"Nothing, none!"

"Do you know what Ribika is?"

"No. Is that another city?"

Rai gave him a 'are-you-fucking-retarded' look.

"What? I told you I don't remember anything right?"

"I am shocked that you really don't remember anything."

Rai went on and precisely recited the whole tale of the goddess Ribika and the origin of their kind, which — Rai pointed out, all kids from the age of five knows from the back of their heads.

Ribika is a godsend Peace-maker. Humans were warring over each other, overcame by greed and lust for power. The humans angered the Creator so much that he sent down a superior being that stopped the war between the humans. That being is Goddess Ribika. After Goddess Ribika stopped the war, the Creator took matters in his own hands and took away the humans' greed and lust, giving them ears and tails. The ears served as a reminder of their past and to guide the humans so they will never repeat history.

Heck, Rai shook his head. It is so widely-known, essentially integrated into their culture that there are plenty of songs and nursery rhythms dedicated to Goddess Ribika. 'Your amnesia is really no joke,' Rai said again. At this point, Konoe just ignored him and waited for Rai to continue on with the story.

There are some cats, though. Rai's expression changed, serious. Who lived their life according to the teachings of Ribika, which was — To live limited. To not to lust for anything. Be happy with what you have. It is fine and all, but when taken to extreme cases, cats use Ribika as a way to groom kids and produce these brain-washed soldiers. They are known as Meigi. They reside in the Southern part of Sisa, in the mountains. These kittens are groomed from a young age and will do anything for the priest who rule over the land. Their words are directly from the Creator.

"What?" Rai asked.

"Do you believe in Ribika?"

"I only believe in myself."

Hm.

The third day passed with nothing special happening. Most of the day is spent with Konoe lying down and staring at the tarp cover over the carriage. Konoe is just surprised that they managed to finish most of the food. They bought so much. Konoe fed a carrot to the horses, but Rai scolded him, telling him to stop wasting food.

The fourth day, Konoe found things to play with, mainly garbage from the food they ate. For instance, the string that tied the jerky together. He started braiding those. He untangled them when he finished and started braiding them again. Then he moved on and started attaching orange peels on a string.

"Why are you drying orange peels?"

"I don't know. Maybe I used to make them a lot?"

It just looks right to him. He tied them on the supporting metal frame over his head that holds up the tarp.

Suddenly, the forest died out and they entered a clearing. Konoe looked at the field in awe. He poked his head out from the back of the carriage to get a better view, but he could only push himself out for so long before his arms gave. So he sat back in the cart and for the first time, he felt frustrated that his view was covered by the tarp. But he solved his problem by climbing to the front of the carriage and sitting on the driver's seat with Rai.

He was smiling.

"What are you doing?"

"What are those?" Konoe responded him with a question, a giant smile plastered on his face.

Rai rolled his eyes at Konoe's excitement. It's like bringing a toddler to the beach for the first time.

"Crops. A variety of them."

"I have never seen such a large plantation."

"You remember what you have seen before? I thought you don't remember anything," Rai scoffed.

"I don't. But I feel like I am more familiar to some things than others. I don't know why. Does that count as remembering things?"

Rai shrugged.

"Hey, Rai."

"What?"

"Can you tell me about things?"

"What things?"

"Anything. I want to know about this place. God forbid, I even forgot the name of this continent."

Rai scoffed and sighed.

"How basic?"

"Anything."

"Sisa. Ransen is the biggest city in Sisa. The plantation you see? Farms for Ransen."

"What do you want to know specifically?" Rai asked again because just what in the world does "anything" justify for?

"Anything," Konoe said again, which wasn't helping Rai because it is so broad. So Rai just decided to talk about the continent.

Rai told him that this continent is called Sisa. Surrounding Sisa is a huge desert. No one knows what is beyond the desert. Groups of caravan did venture out the desert. However, most of them came back after running out of supplies or some never returned. There are groups of cats who are planning to caravan the desert out together. Next year, they are going to go out to the East desert with a headcount of 100 members.

"I kinda want to see the desert."

Rai did not comment on that.

When they arrive at Ransen, they went through a pretty beat up entrance. Rai told him the entrance from the West is bigger and more extravagant. Most cats travel from the West. The Northern has nothing except for a forest. There is no reason for the mayor to elaborate on the Northern entrance.

Ransen is not just a city. IT IS THE CITY. It is so massive. He has never seen anything like this. He is more familiar with rural areas and forests. Perhaps, that was where he was before his amnesia.

As they go down South, there are more and more buildings. At some point, they entered a large street and Konoe was just shocked by the sheer amount of houses. Not to mention the structures! The houses were essentially stacked upon each other like wooden blocks, creating multiple floors. There were walkways with railings built, separating the layers of houses. And cats were everywhere. On the ground, crowd parting as the carriage went by, near shop sides, on the walkway, some are even on the roofs. It was wild. Where ever he looked, there were cats. Laughing, arguing, talking, gossiping about their neighborhood, talking about food, yelling their frustrations about jobs. There were so many conversations that they blend into this one giant buzz. It was overwhelming. He was between nervous and awe-struck.

The wagon gradually came to a halt. They were in front of a horse stall. They both hopped off and the horse cart was returned. Rai nodded towards a direction, urging Konoe to follow him. Konoe did. However, he also stopped and looked. Then, he walked a few steps and stopped again, staring at another wonder that caught his eyes.

". . . at the inn."

What? He wasn't listening.

"We are missing a hand at the inn," Rai repeated, eyeing Konoe in the corner of his eye.

"You will help out."

Okay.

"Just don't tell Bardo that you are there to stake out."

Konoe nodded, slowly taking in the new information. Konoe waited for Rai to tell him who Bardo is? Unfortunately, the white cat did not take it upon himself to explain. So Konoe took matters in his hands and asked Rai who Bardo was, but Rai did not answer him. The rest of the trip was quiet.

By the time they were at the inn, the sky was dark.

Unlike the main street, this street was smaller and there weren't any street lanterns that lit the way. Instead, the street was dimly lit by the light that is coming off the individual stores. It was dim, but it is bright enough to make down the street.

As he walked closer to the inn, Konoe noticed voices coming from the inn. The chatter was at full blast by the time he made it to the entrance. There was a short drapery hanging from the door frame that blocked off the view of the inn from the streets. However, the door was wide open for any cats to drop by.

Rai walked right in, pushing through the blinds. However, Konoe felt uncomfortable intruding, his eyes darting everywhere, taking in all the details he could get. In the end, he still followed suit and entered the shop because it is a whole lot more uncomfortable if he just stood in the entrance, alone.

The shop is pretty spacey, there were at least 10 long tables fitted in the shop. Most of the tables were filled with food and cats, laughing and going on about their day. No one seems to bat him an eye, they are all invested in their own circles. This, Konoe found comforting and he felt less self-conscious.

Rai stopped by what Konoe believes is the kitchen.

"Hey," said Rai casually, as he stood in kitchen light.

"Huh?" A large striped cat turned his head and gave Rai a disbelieving look.

"You are late! You were supposed to be back a week ago!"

"Yeah, something came up," Rai gave Konoe a side glance and then backed up. Konoe believes that this is when he should show himself, so Konoe stepped into the light. Immediately, he was met with a harsh glare.

"Who is this?"

"Someone."

"Someone?"

"He is here to work."

"What? You don't show your face for a week and then you bring home an employee? Is this one of your mess again!"

Rai walked pass the kitchen, down the hall and disappeared behind a long draping curtain. Konoe's eyes immediately snapped back to the cat he assumes is Bardo.

"So," the cat dropped his hands to the towel hanging from his waist and began wiping them while looking at Konoe.

"What is your name?"

At this point, Konoe should just come up with a name to call himself. It is really inconvenient to avoid eyes and say nothing when people ask for a name. But nothing comes up in his head at the moment, then his eyes zone out into the background of the kitchen and he sees a mountain of vegetation: leaf.

"Ha(leaf)."

"Hah?" Bardo narrowed his eyes at him. "I am asking for your name."

[Japanese word for leaf is ha.]

Okay. That does not work. Another name. What is a believable name? Konoe looks down and sees blue. His pants. They are blue.

"Ao," the name escaped his lips unexpectedly.

He is surprised how easy the name rolled off his tongue and how familiar it rings in his ears. Out of nowhere, a wave of nostalgia attacks him, filling him with a sense of longing and this weird bittersweet sensation. Who is Ao? Is it someone he knows?

"Ao, I see. Nice to meet you."

Konoe snaps back up, the loud voice pulling him back to present. A hand was outstretched.

Konoe awkwardly took the hand.

Bardo flashed him a bright grin.

"I'm sorry for whatever Rai did. That kid is always like that, doing whatever he wants. I am not surprised if he forced you into this."

No. Wrong. If anything, Rai is like his savior. But, maybe a little. The inn part was totally unheard of. He couldn't think of anything quick enough to say to Bardo. Before he could come up with any sort of answer, Bardo already moved on from him.

"Ken! Look after the kitchen I am stepping away for a bit."

A frustrated groan came back, saying that he is already busy caught up with serving customers.

Bardo led Konoe past the curtain and Konoe is greeted by a neat corridor with a few rooms. Immediately to the right, there is a small room, in which Konoe recognize the area as where clean things are stored. There is a large brown drawer with clean towels, table cloth, dishes and whatnot on top of it. The drawer was big enough to touch both sides of the room, that was how small the room was. Bardo pointed to the aprons in one of the slots, saying that no matter what, an employee should always wear an apron. It's for the sake of sanitary.

Bardo also told Konoe off to bath, 'you stink like spoiled rice left in a pot for weeks!' he said. Does he really smell that bad? Konoe sniffed himself and did not smell anything. Either way, Konoe found himself standing awkwardly in the middle of the bathroom. What is happening? One moment he is being chased by cutthroat hunters and the next he is in a domestic bathroom taking a bath. Konoe decided he should just get on with it. Konoe does not want to spend too much dwelling on such thoughts. The water was pretty cold and he tried to wipe himself off as much as he can using his hands. His hair though, there is nothing he could do about it. He has to soak them. So he bends down and carefully poured water on his head, paying heed to his ears.

He shivered as a stream of cold water ran down his chest and back. He lathed himself up with soap, washed soap away and then slipped on tunic and pants that Bardo gave him. He dunked his dirty clothes in a basket that he believes is for dirty laundry and then stepped out of the bathroom with sopping hair. Bardo was thrown off. He hastily grabbed a towel from the drawer and wrapped Konoe's hair with it.

Konoe felt nervous as the older cat touched his hair. Panic pricked his skin.

"You are still a kitten ain't you?"

Somehow that came off as belittling to Konoe and he hated it.

"I am not a kitten," Konoe snarled back, panic temporarily forgotten.

"You can't even dry yourself properly. Still a kitten."

Konoe angrily snapped away, pulling the towel from Bardo's hands. He dried himself.

He put on an apron and Bardo told him what to do. The striped cat briefly introduced him to the drawer room and showed him what things are stored in the drawers. Then Bardo showed him to the kitchen and told him not to touch the stove. Konoe is on dishwashing duty for his first month or as long as it takes until Bardo trusts him with the food. 'Don't go anywhere,' Bardo tells him. Konoe wouldn't want to go anywhere anyway. He is very aware that he is being chased by bounty hunters. Although Rai told him that it is safe in Ransen since there are so many cats, he is still afraid that there would be a chance of someone recognizing him if wander in the streets.

So he spent the rest of the night washing dishes. Then, they ate dinner when the shop closed. They ate beef stock noodles because there are still some noodles left and those go bad by the morning.

He slept in the spare room. He heard it belonged to the previous employee, but that cat left and returned home for marriage.


	3. Spring Festival

Konoe woke up humid, hair sticking against his forehead, body sluggish, blanket thrown across the bed, long forgotten. The air feels so hot and heavy. His languid eyes opened to catch a glimpse of wooden ceiling and then closed again. The room was cast by a dim morning glow. Konoe decided to go back to sleep, seeing that the sun is not fully up yet. Tossing and turning, Konoe could feel the hot air cling close to him like glue. No matter what position he is in, the air crowd around him; it was simply impossible to sleep like this.

Click.

Konoe looked over his shoulder to see who it was. Konoe was greeted by the familiar appearance of a fellow white cat, silver hair tied in a ponytail. Brown eyes shifted down and saw a crate in arms.

Konoe pushed himself up. He is now well awake, alert even, curious at the white cat's presence in his room.

"What is that?" Konoe asked, staring at the crate that Rai is holding.

"Kuim."

It sounds very familiar. Konoe pointed his nose higher to get a better look at the box contents. Inside the box, there are many soft, red fruits, every one of them looking enticing.

"Have you ever tried it before? " Rai asked.

"I don't know."

Rai's expression sank and he muttered 'right', momentarily forgotten that the cat in front of him has severe amnesia. The white cat walked past him, dropping the crate on the empty corner of the room next to the bedside drawer. Blue gaze shifted to him.

"You should help out."

"Okay?"

Then something came flying to him. He caught it just in time. He looked down into his palm and saw the fruit in question.

"Try it."

Konoe looked up at Rai with a questionable gaze, but his curiosity was creeping up on him so he satisfied it by pressing his nose against the soft skin and inhaled deeply.

Sweet.

A sudden soft, warmth encompasses him as he felt a light buzz take over his sensations.

_Eat slower, you are going to choke._

It was as if he was taken to another world. Another dimension. He was floating. The sun was warm on his back.

_But it tastes so good!_

_I know. Hopefully, this won't be the last batch of this season._

He felt at peace. He felt like he was meant to be. He felt all the joy in the world.

_Grandma, thank you!_

_You are welcome, Konoe dear._

_Konoe._

" _Oi_ ," fingers snapped in front of his face. Konoe was instantly grounded back to reality.

"Huh?" He looked up at Rai with a dazed look.

"Why are you staring off into space?"

What just happened? He remembered feeling very warm and there was an old female cat. Who is she? But what struck out to him was that name she called.

Konoe...the name rings so close to home. He feels like he has known his entire life. Who is Konoe? Just when he asks himself that question, realization dawns upon him. It hit him like spiraling ball. He _is_ Konoe.

It's like a knot that finally came undone. It's like having that annoying itch located on that unreachable spot of the back scratched. It was that kind of euphoria. It was rushing through him. He was excited.

He was Konoe. He repeated it again and again in his head, not getting sick of it anytime soon. He finally remembered something! How come he-

"You are doing it again."

The voice was like a disruptive cut through his thoughts, Konoe snapped up again.

"What?" Konoe asked once more, looking a bit lost.

"Why are you so distracted?"

"Oh...I'm...um" Konoe tried to push words out, anything, but his head was racing in blankness.

"I think...uh- I think I remember my name?" Konoe finally said, uncertainty in his voice. The thought still confusing to him.

"Ao, right? Bardo told me," Rai said casually as though it is the most obvious thing in existence.

"No, it's Konoe," he corrected.

Rai, hummed, eyebrows scrunched, confused at the sudden information, but he accepted it anyway.

"Konoe," Rai tried it on his tongue.

"That name fits you more."

The soft brown eyes widen. Does it? Somehow he felt embarrassed at Rai's comment. He waited for Rai's remark on why his name suddenly changed from Ao to Konoe, but nothing came. The white cat just moved on.

"Anyway, when you are ready, come out."

Rai left the room and closed the door behind him, leaving Konoe alone in the room. Konoe stood staring at the back of the door, mind still pondering about the faint sensation in that strange dimension. The more he thought about it, the more he wondered why it happened. Then, he thought back to a sweet smell. The kuim. And slowly a connection sprung up between the kuim and that hazy incident.

It was pretty obvious right? The kuim probably triggered the memory. Then, he pondered— if triggers are relevant, then maybe he could _remember_. Maybe his amnesia wasn't so hopeless. Maybe he'll remember more if he were to see a variety of other things. He should tell Rai.

Konoe changed out his pajamas, ate the kuim, his brows shot up as how good it was. The fruit was sweet for the most part, but there was also a hint of sourness that gave the taste a kick and Konoe has to say it was a very interesting taste. Eventually, Konoe was done and was by the door to help with moving boxes.

Konoe asked why they need to move the boxes to his room while they made their way through the kitchen hallway the second time. Today was extra hot. He was sweating like a dog against the heatwave; his whole face was glistening in the sun from all the sweat produced. Rai said that it is because the food storage room ran out of space.

"Why do we need so much ingredients?" Konoe asked just as a drop of sweat fell from his brow.

"The Spring fest is almost here, in about a week. Candied fruits are popular," the older cat explained while he dropped another crate in the tiny room. Very soon the room would be stuffed full with crates. There are already a few crates lining up the hallway.

"What is the Spring Festival exactly?" Konoe asked again, last time Rai didn't really answer him. He did tell him about Ribika though.

"It's a festival that celebrates birth, fertility, starting anew, turning a new leaf, things like that."

Oh. Konoe mouthed.

While they were getting the last batch of ingredients off the carriage, Konoe spotted an old female cat who stopped by to chat with Bardo.

Konoe glanced over to the old cat for a brief moment. She met his eyes and smiled.

_You are welcome, Konoe dear._

The voice suddenly spoke to him in the back of his head and he felt a glimpse of the warm buzz rise. He has a grandma. A kind grandma who gave him fruits.

While he was in this weird trance of stupidly staring at the old cat, he was blind to the crates in front of him. The result was that he tripped, the crate in his arms ended up falling forward. He watched in horror as the fruits launched out. They rolled in all directions like scurrying mice and his eyes could not possibly keep track of all of them. Konoe ended up frozen in spot with a terrified expression on his face.

He did not start moving until Rai yelled at him 'stupid cat'. Then, did he crouched down and grabbed as many fruits as possible.

"Here, dear," a sudden voice said from above.

Konoe looked up and saw the old cat from before with a piece of fruit in her hand.

"Thank you..." Konoe trailed off and took the fruit gently from her grasp.

"Are you okay?"

Konoe looked down and his knees are scraped but he is pretty much okay.

"I am fine. Don't worry about me."

Konoe felt a bump on his arms, he looked to his side. Rai came to him with an armful of fruits.

"Stupid cat, how did you trip from that?" scolded Rai. He didn't know how he did it either. He probably looked like an idiot. Konoe felt stupid too. Embarrassed and stupid.

"I'm sorry."

Konoe took the fruits from Rai's arms, dumped them in the crate; then picked a few more scattered fruits before lifting the crate in his arms. This time he'll be more careful. He is just glad that none of the fruits got trampled over.

Out of curiosity, Konoe's eyes wandered towards the old cat from before. He felt a slight attachment to her, most likely due to the incident from this morning. His eyes found her waving goodbye to Bardo, she was ready to leave. Their eyes met again for a brief moment, before she smiled at him and left.

Rai went on calling him stupid the whole entire day. He never heard Rai call him Konoe again. Unfortunately.

"Hey, stupid cat."

"What?" Konoe asked, too tired to fight back. The last time he fought back, Rai just rambled at him saying that stupid cats are stupid cats. What kind of cat gets so distracted that they trip in the middle of work? Even more unbelievable, that laughable-thing-of-a-cat makes an old cat do the work for him? Isn't that retarded? Aren't you stupid?

Ugh...thinking back just pisses him off even more.

"The last batch is in, just lock the doors and we are good for the night."

"Got it."

He did all that, closed the oil lamps and went back in his room. There were so many crates and bags of sugar that he practically had to jump to get to bed.

As he closes his eyes, his head drifts back to the old female cat and her kind smiles. He fell asleep reimagining the scene from the morning.

Konoe kept on dreaming sounds and voices. They brush his ears, blurry and soft. Too soft. They are talking about something. Consistent. Mumbling. Focused. Laughing. And sometimes they talked to Konoe. Konoe knew, he felt he understood them. However, by the time Konoe woke up, nothing remains. Nothing registers. It is frustrating.

This caused Konoe to occasionally stop and think about what exactly it was that he forgot.

Bardo noticed Konoe's odd behavior because Konoe is always zoning out or is washing the same dish repeatedly. Konoe caught himself doing it a couple of times too and felt embarrassed.

As a result, Konoe figure it'll probably do him good if he were to go out to the world and see things. There might be some things that can shock his memory. When his lunch break came, he discussed this with Rai. Surprisingly, Rai accepted the situation pretty quickly, saying that it wasn't a bad idea. He even told Konoe that he'll come with him. They stepped out during lunch when the inn was practically empty.

Rai brought him to the main street, where there were the most things to see. Crowded and bustling with life, the amount of cats on the main street still surprises him. Everywhere he looked, there were cats. Rai said that when the Spring Festival comes at full blast, the streets would be even more crowded. The streets will practically become a flood of cats, shoulders to shoulders. Konoe cringed at the idea.

Even with this crowd, however, Konoe still felt vulnerable. Rai told him that the crowd will hide his identity because there are too many things going on at once, no one will be looking at him. Konoe understood the concept, but it still makes him nervous. It only takes one pair of eyes to spot him and he'll be doomed. Konoe ended up keeping his hood on and held a lowered gaze most of the time.

They passed many stalls in the main street.

Different things. From rings, to ropes, to clothes, to sculptures, to wind chimes. Nothing. Sure the objects are interesting, but nothing. Nothing triggered memories for him. Konoe felt discouraged.

As the pair made it down the end of the main street, they sectioned off into another smaller vendor street. There weren't as many stalls as the main street, but there were still things that made Konoe go 'wow'. Konoe was studying a hollow instrument when the atmosphere started to change. Cats started to whisper among themselves. The small crowd was parting to the sides. Something was coming through. Rai tapped his shoulders and gestured him to move.

The shoutings of 'move's and 'coming through's got louder gradually. Over the crowd, Konoe could see something white. He briefly thought it was a large egg, but the imagery collapsed when Konoe saw the structure in front of him.

It was huge. Three stories tall. The wagon it was sitting on isn't small either, a little bit bigger and the side of the wagon would brush him.

The structure was covered with a tarp, hence Konoe couldn't make out what the structure was and he was really curious to know. He nudged at Rai.

"What is that?" He asked, eyes glued to the moving structure.

"A prop for the spring fest."

"It's huge though!" Konoe flabbergasted.

"It's normal."

"Where are they going?" Konoe asked eyes still following the structure.

"Library."

"Library?"

It didn't make sense to Konoe. Why would they go there? What is the point in bringing a giant Spring festival prop to the library? Are they going to read there?

"You wanna see?"

Konoe looked at him confused.

"The library."

Konoe didn't know what was the deal with the library, but if Rai is offering to show him around, he'll accept.

He was wrong about the library. Actually, he wasn't even sure if this was the library. It was absolutely astonishing. There were so many cats here. They were all setting up their stalls, preparing for the upcoming festival. Turns out Rai was right. The size of the prop was normal. Most of the stalls had a sculpture next to it, probably for attracting customers; it seems as though the more popular a stall was, the larger and more extravagant their sculpture would be.

They are now passing through rows and rows of stalls. In the center, lied the library. Rai told him that the library is a relic of the past. It came directly from the first generation of Ribika; many saw it as a gift from their ancestors—to educate themselves of the foolishness of greed. That's why to this day, cats still worshipped the library. The city even dedicated a town square to it.

Although the library was mostly seen as a place of worship, it still functions as a normal library. It is the perfect place for stupid cats, Rai added. Konoe ignored him.

After walking around for a bit, they decided to go back.

The pair has made it back to the main street, but for some reason, this time around, there was an immense amount of cat blocking the street. The crowd seemed to be focused on something. The words "brat" and "murderer" were thrown around the air.

Konoe knew better than to poke his nose into things. But...they were not talking about him right? If they weren't, then everything is good, but it scares him. He needed to know. Before he knew it, his legs moved on their own. Behind him, Rai was calling after him, but the calls went ignored. Konoe didn't even hear them. Wedging through the crowd, Konoe reached the center and his heart dropped, he short-circuited.

In the center was a billboard.

Wanted: Alive

1000 g

Gender: Male

Height: 160 cm

Age: 13

Eyes: Brown

Coat: Orange and white

Breed: Small

Additional traits: Long hair, crooked tail

His eyes zeroed on the '1000 g'. It leaped from 300 to 1000 g. The reward sufficiently increased. It was insane.

"1000 g! That's enough to buy a plot of land in Ransen!"

"Wow, that is a lot for a damn brat."

"But isn't he young? Why is his bounty so high?"

"Who knows? He might be a serial killer, you'll never know."

The wanted notice was undoubtedly there for him. His heart was thumping loudly in his ears. His skin was pricking, chills crawled up his spine. This just encourages people to want him even more. He is scared. Fear took over him. What should he do? He felt eyes on him. Cats are watching him. They are after him. He just knew. He tugged on his hood more and slowly backed away from the crowd. But when he looked up, he didn't see cats anymore. He saw dark shadows. Every single one of them are watching him. Eyes wide. At him.

Something was rising up his chest. It felt like it was going to submerge him in any minute and he couldn't _breathe._

He felt a pull on his arm.

His immediate reaction was 'danger'. The alarms in his head went off. His body on defense mode. Konoe whipped around, teeth bared, claws drawn, pupils blown. He swung heavily with every intention to kill, but his arm was stopped mid-air. Konoe gave a feral hiss, pulling to set his hand free. But then he saw blue, sharp blue.

"Konoe," a soft, deep voice called.

It was Rai.

"We need to leave."

Rai moved, pulling his wrist. The grip on his wrist loosened, he could feel warmth radiating from Rai's palm. His rapid heart slowed down. He was calm. He was safe. He didn't know when, but the blood-curdling feeling around him dissipated and the surroundings melted into a blur. He only saw Rai's back.

Rai was silent while they walked back. It was obvious to Konoe that the older cat was disappointed in him even though the eldest hasn't said a word. Konoe just followed behind Rai with ears flattened, tail between his legs, silent.

They passed through the main street and made a turn into a recognizable smaller street, the one that traces back to the inn. There were relatively fewer cats now that the sun is setting.

"You should never stray from me," Rai suddenly spoke up.

It caught Konoe off guard. He didn't know how to reply.

"If you act so rash every time a problem comes up, you are going to die fast," Rai's tone dropped towards the end. He was serious.

Konoe stared at the ground, boring holes into his shoes. He wanted to say something to alleviate the tension, but he knew that no words can make it better. At the end, he just choked out a pathetic 'sorry' that he wasn't even sure if Rai heard.

From that day on, Konoe stayed in the inn. It was not worth it to explore the streets with his bounty being the center of attention. He even caught some customers in shop talking about it — saying that they wished they can find that kid. It made Konoe really anxious. He was glad for once that he was permanently stuck washing dishes for a month.

As for Rai, they haven't really spoken after that. It wasn't a big thing, but Konoe can tell that Rai is still mad at him, so Konoe didn't bother to strike up a conversation. The other one did not initiate conversation either. So there's that.

Surprisingly, by the end of the week, the topic shifted. Konoe thought the cats would be talking about him for weeks on end. But thanks to the Spring festival, the matter concerning his bounty eventually disappeared.

The feeling of 'oh the Spring festival arrived' hit him when the rooms gradually filled out. The decorations for the festival started to show themselves. People were putting bright flowers on their storefronts. Pink flags and lanterns line the streets. It was quite the scene. Not to mention the blooming cherry blossoms.

Bardo started to get really busy. He was always seen working, preparing snacks, preparing candied fruits late at night. Even during lunch break, Bardo was in the kitchen. Three days before the festival, there were still half of the crates unfinished.

It was at night when Bardo suddenly stopped him. The older cat asked him if he can offer a helping hand. Konoe gladly accepted because he understood that Bardo is overworking himself. However, Konoe was unsure if he should be touching the things in the kitchen. He would rather stay safe washing dishes — not that he _loved_ washing; it's just that he felt unqualified to cook.

Konoe asked Bardo why he didn't ask Rai for help. Rai should be more familiar with these things, he has been here for years. The striped cat gave him a small smile and shrug. Rai is too busy.

Thinking back, it's true. The cat was gone when lunch break starts, he did come back during the night to help out, but that was it. Rai doesn't stay for a long time.

So that was it. He is going to help Bardo with the candied fruits.

Candied fruits were surprisingly easy to make. It's the dipping part that takes a long time because the candy mixture cools rather quickly. This meant that Bardo can only cook a limited batch of coating or else the candy mixture will become too thick. But with Konoe here, Bardo opened another pot. They should be able to handle another pot with two sets of hands.

So they developed this role where Bardo watches the sugar and Konoe dips the fruit. They have been doing pretty good, going through one crate of the kuim rather smoothly. There are three left. However towards the end, Bardo suddenly asked him to watch over the fire.

This surprised Konoe because he didn't think that he was ready himself. In fact, he was quite nervous, he was afraid that he might mess up.

Bardo began by telling him the sugar mixture will gain that desired "hard crack" at around 20 minutes of cooking. If you pull it off too quickly, the coating wouldn't harden and if you cook it for too long, it will burn. Now! That is it!

Konoe looked at the sugar confused. He didn't get it at _all_. Must be a chef thing. He has no clue how Bardo can tell the sugar is ready by looking at it. Bardo laughed when he voiced his concerns. There is actually a more comprehensible way to do this. Just put a drop of the mixture in water, if it forms hard threads, it is ready.

Konoe was able to create his first batch of candy with that advice. He was surprised that he pulled it off.

"Good job!" said Bardo.

However, what surprised him even more was when a large hand ran through his hair. Konoe flinched away, alarmed at the sudden contact. Bardo backed away, hand in the air and apologized. After a moment, Konoe apologized too, he shouldn't have acted so strongly. Bardo was just ruffling his hair out of praise.

Bardo continued to create the next batch of sugar and Konoe continued with dipping the kuim into sugar. Then, out of nowhere

"But seriously, your hair is really tangled."

"Huh?"

"It's like a war up there."

"Okay?" He felt a bit embarrassed.

"Do you mind if I groom it?"

"No, it's ok, go ahead," Konoe said, surprised at the sudden offer. He tried not to fidget so much this time, confused why he felt so strongly before.

The striped cat stood behind him while Konoe continued to work. Once he felt fingers running from the top of his head down to his neck, he was shocked. It felt surprisingly good. Bardo was really gentle about it too. When the older cat ran into a lump of tangled mess, he took the time to untangle them slowly. Konoe felt like his scalp was being tickled.

"Why is it this bad? Don't you wash your hair?"

"I do it's just that...um...the water is very cold."

The movements stopped abruptly. With that, the pleasure came to a shrieking halt. Konoe felt empty. Subconsciously, he wanted those fingers to continue. After a moment, they did, they slowly picked up. Relief spread through his chest and he found himself leaning against the touch.

"You know you can heat up the bath?"

"Really?" He had no idea, "I have never seen you or Rai use it before."

"That's because the cold water feels great in the summer," Bardo chuckled.

"So we don't use it much, but we do in the winter," he added.

Konoe nodded. At this point, he started to feel soft and gooey. His body was completely relaxed. It feels too good. He had no idea that grooming can feel this great.

"I can show you afterward."

"Okay," Konoe replied nonchalantly, unaware of the purring that escaped his throat.

"You really are a kitten," Bardo amused.

"I'm not," Konoe weakly protested.

Bardo didn't make another comment. A comfortable silence fell on them. Bardo continued to groom him carefully while Konoe worked.

Then out of nowhere again

"If Rai is just 5 percent as cute as you, it'll be great. But that guy is stubborn."

Konoe straight up froze. He had no idea how to react to that; so he just awkwardly grabbed more skewers and prepared the kuims for dipping. However, as he thought about Bardo's words, he became curious. What is Rai's relationship with Bardo? He knew that Bardo was Rai's guardian of some sort, that part was obvious. But is he Rai's actual father?

When Konoe asked Bardo that question. The striped cat replied:

"No, I picked him up. He looked so sad, so I had to help him."

Konoe looked at Bardo, stupid. That was such a half-assed reason to save someone, but at the same time, you can say that Bardo is very big-hearted. The reasoning was very familiar, it reminded Konoe of a certain silver-haired cat's reasoning.

_You just happened to look half-dead on the ground and I don't want you to die on me when I could have done something._

Konoe smiled inwardly. Rai did say something like that. At first, he really doubted Rai for that reason. It just made no sense to Konoe that someone can be so self-sacrificing, to help someone without expecting a reward. After hearing the same nonsensical reasoning from Bardo, however, Konoe can slightly understand why. Rai really picks up from Bardo.

He is really thankful for these two. If they weren't there, he is sure he would've just died along with the landslide. Or he would've gotten captured. He really couldn't believe it.

After a while, Bardo finally stopped grooming and they continued to work on the last crate for the day. While they were working, Bardo brought up the situation about the stalls.

Konoe learned that they are going to set up a stall in front of the inn. Normally, stall owners would rent a space in the town square, but the thing is, it's too expensive. It's not a big deal though, they are pretty popular on their own that they sell pretty well despite locating in a smaller street.

"Do you want to help out?" Bardo asked.

Konoe paused.

He felt uneasy. There are a couple of things that bothered him. First of all, he isn't used to serving customers, he is afraid that he might make a fool out of himself. Secondly, standing behind a stall meant publicly displaying his face. That was something that he had avoided for the past week. There is no guarantee that no one will recognize him. He basically fit all the descriptions except for the long hair.

He should consult with Rai first.

"Maybe not?"

Bardo's face immediately fell, but the older cat gave an understanding nod. Konoe felt bad. He wanted to do it. For all the things that the older cat has done for him, Konoe is disappointed that he couldn't reciprocate the small favor.

So there he was. For the first time ever, in front of Rai's door. It has been almost a week, but Konoe is still nervous when it comes to speaking with Rai. Braving up, he knocked softly. The moment he heard feet shuffling against wooden floor, Konoe felt his heart jump.

The door opened, Rai stood by the doorway looking down on him. The first thing that Konoe noticed was the missing weapons and belts. In fact all of his armor has been taken off. It was the first time Konoe saw Rai wearing plain clothes without his armory.

"What do you want?"

"Um...I want to help Bardo out with the spring festival stall."

Silence.

"Would it be too dangerous?" Konoe tried again when there was a lack of response.

"Yes. Do you even need to ask about that, stupid cat?" Rai spat harshly.

Konoe winced at Rai's displeased tone. His ears instantly flat against his skull. Obviously, he knew he shouldn't go out. Rai is right. Why did he even ask? However, he is glad that Rai doesn't seem to be as angry as before.

"Okay, sorry for bothering you," said Konoe, dejectedly. He was about to leave when he heard Rai exhale a soft breath of air.

"Wait," Rai said and went back into his room.

Konoe's ear perked to Rai's sudden change of attitude.

Through the small gap, Konoe got a glimpse of the bedroom inside. Everything was so orderly placed, neat. Even the bed was made, contrasting to Konoe's bed where his blanket was haphazardly thrown across the mattress. But what struck out to Konoe the most were the bookshelves in the back. If he remembered correctly, there were also a lot of bookshelves back in the small cabin.

It appeared to him that Rai likes to read, which is disagreeing with Rai's image as a tough, skilled fighter. The more he thought about it, the more curious he became. What was the white cat so engrossed with that he had to own a few shelves of?

Konoe heard creaking footsteps near the door. He immediately backed up and looked away, pretending that he wasn't spying into Rai's room just now.

Rai appeared at the doorway with something in his hands. It was a round mask. A weird one. The mask was of a woman with big, round cheeks and obnoxious red lips. To top it off, the paint job is horrible; the left lashes have been smeared diagonally across the forehead. The lips...don't even get him started with it. Konoe stared at the object with furrowed brows and gave Rai a what-the-hell-is-this look.

"It's a spring fest mask, perfect for hiding your face."

"Okay..." Konoe took the abhorrent paper mache in his hands.

"Don't worry, you will blend in. Many cats wear masks during the festival," explained Rai.

Konoe nodded slowly. He understood, but honestly, what is this? How come Rai owns this?

Konoe blew at the dust that managed to accumulate inside the mask, then leaned his face into it. Instantly, he was hit with this papery smell and oh boy, is it hard to breathe in this. He looked at Rai.

"How is it?" he asked with a muffled voice.

What he got was a small chuckle. He couldn't see well due to the insanely small eye holes, but did Rai laugh? Konoe was slightly annoyed that Rai had the nerve to laugh at him, but at the same time, he is shocked to hear Rai laugh. It is the first time. He didn't know Rai was capable of that. Most of the time, Rai had this imperturbable aura about him, and he rarely showed his emotions.

Konoe frowned and took the mask off, feeling self-conscious.

"This looks weird doesn't it?"

"No, it looks great on you."

"You just laughed," Konoe pointed out.

"You heard it wrong," Rai spoke in a calm tone.

Konoe eyed at Rai, suspicious.

"Yeah, right."

Konoe looked at Rai then at the mask…whatever. It's just a mask. It doesn't really matter. He'll only wear it for a few days max. It's better to look ugly than being recognized.

Spring festival was great.

The morning of Spring festival, he was woken up by loud crackling explosions. Yes, explosions. His heart literally leaped out of his chest when the sound went off. Turns out, those explosions were firecrackers. He opened his window to a long parade going down their street. Cats were scattering confetti, they were singing, dancing, playing instruments. Konoe could feel his heart pound in excitement.

Bardo closed the restaurant early because the majority of the cats are traveling to the town library or finding fun in festival stalls nearby. No one would come in and have a normal meal. Not when there is so much going on outside.

Konoe really wanted to go, but he knew it was too dangerous for him currently. Plus, he promised Bardo that he will help out with the stall. Right after the breakfast period ended, Konoe cleaned the tables, stacked the chairs on top and lined the entrance with the crates of candied fruits.

Ken was moving back and forth from the storage room to bring out the Spring festival themed decorations and tables. When the last crate landed on the entrance tile, Konoe went back to his room to get the mask. The moment he lifted the mask, Konoe was instantly reminded of Rai.

Where is Rai anyways? The cat was absent since morning. Actually, he seemed quite busy the past week. He was always gone by lunch break and returns late at night, right before the shop closes.

"Oh, you are wearing it."

"What?"

"Rai's mask. I bought it for him a couple festivals back," Bardo explained.

Oooh, that was how rai got it. He thought it was strange for someone like Rai to own this. There is no way that Rai would buy this on his own.

If he were to be honest, Konoe did not believe that they can sell all the candy, it's just a lot of candied fruits. The whole dining room was filled with it. Amazingly, this stuff sells fast. Cats were piling in their storefront like starving animals. On his left, someone is stuffing him money. Before he can even get the candy out, on his right, another cat is asking for two pops. Then that cat over there is asking for three or was it four? There were a lot of cats. They sold half the first day.

Konoe was dead by the end of the day. He was constantly refilling the trays. He was surprised when Bardo asked him what he wanted to eat. Bardo still had the energy to cook dinner for them and the customers. It was beyond Konoe.

While they were eating, Bardo spoke up.

"If you want, you can go play for tomorrow. Enjoy the festival. I and Ken will handle the shop. Tell Rai to go with you."

"Ehhhh...Bardo-san...I want to go toooo," Ken whined.

"Paycheck."

_"Tch."_

Rai? The thought of asking Rai to the festival makes him nervous.


	4. Surrounded by Spring Festival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Konoe's first time at the Spring Festival.

"Ask Rai to go with you."

It doesn't make sense. _Shift_. Why would Bardo let him go to the festival? _Turn_. Wasn't his purpose here to help out with the inn? Going out to have fun would be doing the exact opposite of that. Flop. He stared at the ceiling. But it's even weirder that Bardo brought Rai into this. Wasn't Rai busy?

The next morning, Konoe stared at Rai's door, hesitating to knock. What should he say? Would Rai agree though? He hadn't seen the white cat for the past week. The only time he saw Rai was during night shifts. But yet again, Rai was too busy serving that Konoe hadn't gotten the chance to talk to him. It's only natural for Konoe to assume that Rai's priority was work.

So it never occurred to him that the white cat would say 'sure.' Konoe narrowed his eyes at Rai.

"What's with that face?"

"Aren't you busy?"

"Not at the moment."

"Oh, okay."

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Just spit it out."

"Are you okay with me? Going to the festival? You are fine?" Konoe flopped with his words. He didn't expect the white cat to agree after all. He hoped he got the message across at least. However, he earned an brow raise from Rai, cluing him in that he was not making much sense.

"Don't you have better things to do?" Konoe rephrased. Maybe not the best words to say.

Rai looked a little bit done with the cat in front of him.

"Do you want me to go with you or not?"

"I-I do! It's just that you seemed very busy lately!"

Rai rolled his eyes, "Meet me at the entrance after breakfast," and closed the door.

Konoe stayed in front of the door for a moment before he decided that he should probably head to breakfast.

The smell of fried eggs and spam filled his nose the moment he entered the dining room. His stomach growled. He did not feel hungry until now. Looking around, he noticed that the dining room was a bit more filled than usual, but that was normal considering that today was the Spring Festival.

Bardo was pretty busy so Konoe decided not to bother the striped cat and sent a simple hi. Bardo was happy to see him. Breakfast arrived shortly, eggs, spam and toast. He wasn't used to sitting with customers so it was a bit awkward. At some time, Rai entered the dining room. They ended up having breakfast together. After they were done, Konoe quickly slotted on his mask and exited the inn.

The streets were teeming with life as usual. However, the streets today looked slightly different from yesterdays. Konoe couldn't exactly pinpoint what was different. It was the general atmosphere. Maybe the colors also? Unlike yesterday's pastel colors, today's were bright, pigmented — a scatter of warm colors. The clothes other cats wore also matched the theme, everything was essentially glowing.

Aside from that, Rai asked him where he wanted to go first, the side streets or directly to the town square. Konoe picked the side streets. He wanted to see every aspect of the festival. Walking around for a while, they came across a small area with a few snack stalls and an adjacent garden; cats were buying snacks and enjoying them under the blossoming cherry trees. Konoe immediately wanted to try it too after seeing it.

He stepped into the garden, amazed by the sheer amount of pink around him. Above him, there was a vast view of pink flowers, budding from the tree branches; below him, the ground was covered with pink petals, scattered everywhere, blanketing everything like a thin layer of snow.

While he looked everywhere excitedly, he spotted an elderly cat sitting on a bench under the pink trees. For some reason, she reminds him of his own grandma. Unfortunately, Konoe hadn't gotten another image aside from the last one. He began to wonder if that fragment was even a reality. Maybe he was daydreaming. But he wants to believe what he saw was real.

They slowly arrived at the town square.

Many things were happening at once. There was this overall hanging murmuring noise of chatter and laughter. Venders were shouting, all trying to impress potential customers. Over to the food vendors, he could hear sizzling sounds, metal scraping sounds from pans, chopping noises. Cats were bargaining, occasionally arguing. There were kittens running around, doing mischief, running through stalls. In the distance, he could hear a faint whisper of instruments, some striking, some mellow.

Even looking up to catch the sun hiding in the clouds gave him a surprise. There were tiny shapes scattered across the sky. All flying independently, showing a beautiful array of reds, yellows, and oranges. There were fruits, flowers, bugs, animals, many spring-related themes.

It was overwhelming.

His eyes were constantly bouncing around, taking in new information.

The two soon arrived at the heart of the town square.

Stalls were selling spring-themed goods. There were colorful clothes, they called it a dancing uniform. There were trinkets in the shape of animals, insects and peaches; apparently peaches symbolize Ribika and spring. Then, there were various stalls selling a clutter of things — kites, umbrellas, knives, games, pots, accessories, and charms.

Despite how quiet and irritated Rai seemed most of the time, he was surprisingly a good host. He answered all the questions Konoe asked and even provided extra information. Gradually, under festival lights, food, laughter, cats, Konoe found peace. He was enjoying himself. He even found himself slowly getting adjusted to the crowd.

Konoe knew the town center was big, he had seen it from afar. However, he hadn't gotten the notion of how big this place was until he was in it and it was gigantic, _enormous_. The rows of stalls were stretching. Konoe was exhausted, he was sweating bullets. They've walked for so long. Working was exhausting, but he didn't expect walking around and standing to be just as exhausting. To top it off, the sun was beating on him and the large crowd was efficiently trapping heat around them.

But nothing is worse than this mask. It was the main culprit. It was suffocating. Over the course of the festival, Konoe had been pulling his mask forward with the space of a thumb to let some air circulate through, but that obviously wasn't enough. He had been feeling more nauseating than ever. And now, he wanted nothing more than a quiet place to take the mask off.

Rai wasn't blind to Konoe's suffering, he asked Konoe a couple of times if he wanted to go back to the inn to take a breather. But Konoe shook his head, saying that going back is a waste of time. He pushed on.

Rai had been ignoring it for a while, but finally couldn't take it. He was afraid the stupid cat will get a heat stroke at this rate.

He abruptly changed his direction, aiming back to where they came from. Konoe was walking in front, but when he realized that Rai was not next to him, he looked back and spotted Rai's back facing him. He was confused, but needless to say, ran after Rai shortly.

"Where are you going?"

"We are getting herbal tea."

"Why?"

"Because it can prevent heat stroke."

Konoe was set back by Rai's words. Heatstroke? Was it that obvious? Konoe thought he'd put up a good front. He wanted to say no out of politeness, but thought twice, because he was definitely dying from heat. 

So in the end, he accepted Rai's kindness and followed the white cat over to a corner store near the library. The stall was pretty empty. There were only a couple of elderly cats lingering around under the stall's provided shade.

Rai ordered two prunella tea. Konoe has no clue what it is. They were then instructed to stand aside and wait. During this time, Konoe glanced up to the overhang, a board listing a bunch of tea names that Konoe has never heard of and his eyes landed on the 'Prunella vulgaris.' He got curious.

"What does prunella tea taste like?" He asked Rai.

Rai side glanced him, "You'll see."

Just in time, two bowls were set in front of them. Rai dropped several coins on the counter and then reached for the bowl. Konoe pulled the mask far enough so he could drink. The tea was surprisingly good. It was sweet and refreshing. He finished it rather quickly in just a few gulps.

They soon left the stall and headed back to the direction they came from.

"The tea was great. Why don't we offer herbal tea in our store? It tastes refreshing, plus it has healing qualities."

Rai gave him a glance and then looked away. 

"Too troublesome." 

"Why?"

Rai sighed, "Stop asking so many questions."

"Okay."

Shadows soon infiltrate the streets of Ransen. The temperature was dropping as night approached. One by one, the street lanterns were lit, creating this beautiful array of orange and red glows. Although the sun was down, the streets were just as lively and packed.

They came across a stall selling guiding plants. Apparently, the leaves of this plant absorb sunlight and release the light through their pores upon touching water. The fresher the leaves, the brighter it is. Konoe's eyes glowed in interest and he really wanted it. Konoe asked Rai for permission. Rai refused, saying these leaves are nothing special. They are cheaper when bought in a bundle. You can find them in any general stores.

"But they are not fresh."

Rai couldn't understand why the stupid cat was so set on with the leaves being 'fresh.' To him, leaves from bundles worked the same, even better due to the convenience. But he guess it all boiled down to how the plant was presented, props to the vender for slowly dripping water down the leaves, essentially making the plant look like it's fruiting golden orbs.

Rai sighed, "Fine, but you are paying me back when you get your paycheck."

"No problem!" Konoe smiled.

In their next area, they entered an area filled with mini-games. Rai limited him to three games. Konoe wasn't good at them, but he had fun. Finally, at his last game, a dart game, he managed to score on his last try. The vender congratulated him and fetched him his prize. It was another one of those fertility masks. He had no use for another one, but this one was way prettier.

"I'm wearing this one. You wear the ugly one."

Konoe quickly switched the masks and handed Rai the ugly one. 

"I'm not wearing it," Rai pushed it away. 

"You have to, it's only fair." 

Rai clicked his tongue and took the mask. He glared at the mask for a good few seconds before shoving the mask on Konoe's head.

"Wear it yourself."

Konoe pulled the mask off his head and laughed, "Come on, wear it!" 

He couldn't believe that Rai would get embarrassed over something like this.

Just as he was about to tease Rai for it, Konoe's ears picked up on faint drumming noise. What was that? He listened carefully this time, ears steering to the direction of the sound. It was definitely drumming noises he heard. And it was getting louder. Closer. He could hear other instruments mixed in as well.

Murmurs started to arise from the crowd. Questions were being thrown around in the air.

"What's going on?"

"Why is it so loud?"

"It's a parade. The fertility parade."

The fertility parade.

Konoe didn't know a big event like this would be going on at night. He stared excitedly at the horizon of the wide street, heart pounding in anticipation. The drumming eventually became more coherent.

The first figures to appear were the marching band. The band strode in proudly with their thunderous beats and rhythm, shaking the core of all the cats nearby. Some held large drums, some small. While Konoe was immensely focused on the marching instruments, the crowd suddenly got more rambunctious, cats were practically screaming their heads off. The cheering got so intense to the point that Konoe had to cover his ears for a second.

Konoe swung his head to the direction of the cheering just to see what in the world caused the deafening shrieking.

And boy was he in for a surprise.

Just behind the marching band, he saw tall standing sculptures. These tall standing sculptures weren't just any normal sculptures. They very much resembled male genitals. Male genitals. Penises. With the sacks, and stuff and all the details that come with being genitals. They were standing proudly in-display one after another. And they were huge. He had to angle his head all the way back to see the top of the sculptures.

Konoe's mouth gaped open, but not a single sound escaped. He stared at the vulgar sculptures, stunned.

"Isn't that too much?" Konoe finally asked in a hushed voice. 

"It's fertility."

"I know but. Can't they get something else? Why _that_?" He whispered the last word, feeling that it'll be taboo if he said it out loud.

"What? Are you embarrassed?"

"No! I mean...yes...kind of...but no."

Rai sighed, "Today's theme is marriage. Sex, marriage, and fertility go hand in hand. So a phallic symbol isn't so out of the picture."

Konoe shook his head in disbelief. This is a celebration about fertility, but that doesn't justify bringing in vulgar images. They could've easily sent the same message using peaches rather than genitals. There are kids out here who are younger than him! How can parents allow their kids to see this?

A red glint flickered from the corner of his vision. He turned his head to see what it was.

It was a red carriage.

It drew him in like a glittering, alluring bait in water.

A striking red. Glowing. Glowering in his face.

And slowly, he felt fear. A sinking feeling.

It felt similar to what he felt that day in front of the billboard, but this time, it is a bit different. It is more desperate. It is clawing out at him. It dropped to the pit of his stomach. It felt wrong.

"What is that?" Konoe asked, voice breaking slightly. 

"A prostitute wagon."

"Why?" 

"It symbolizes the sexual part of fertility." 

"What?" He recoiled, confusion ran rampant over his face.

Prostitution and fertility don't go hand in hand. There is nothing in common. It's all raw and physical. It's brutal. It's everything that you do not wish for in your life.

The more he stared, the more red he saw.

At this point, Konoe wasn't really in the festival anymore. He felt lost. All the sensual cues came to a blur. The voice of the festival drowned in dark deep. He couldn't hear anything except for his own heartbeat. He couldn't see anything except the carriage. The red across his eyes was a taunt.

In that instant, a stomach churning image of red robes and huffed voices flashed before his eyes.

"What about the real ones...isn't that really bad?" Konoe choked. 

He looked upon Rai with eyes filled with terror, with uncertainty.

"We have to do something..."

One of his hand latched onto Rai firmly.

"We have-"

"We are going home."

"What? But what about them? What about-" 

Something felt completely off about Konoe. His actions and words are incoherent. His eyes are looking somewhere far, unseeing. He is losing himself. And that in and of itself is dangerous. This cat is very capable of doing something stupid at the moment.

Rai grabbed his shoulders.

"Tell me, where are we?"

Konoe returned a blank look.

"What is in front of us?"

"A parade?" Konoe answered, sounding so unsure of himself.

"You are right. We are currently in Ransen, at the Spring Festival. Do you remember?"

Konoe nodded at that, his gaze lowered.

"Good," Rai patted his shoulders, "Now, can you take a deep breath for me?"

Konoe did as instructed.

"Slowly exhale."

He did just that.

"Continue taking long breaths."

Konoe could feel the tension dissipate from his body. Each exhale was like a pump, forcing out negative feelings. Gradually, the pain in his head lessened. The storming confusion raging inside him came to a full stop. He was no longer plagued by this feeling of helplessness, of being oppressed, of being unable to breathe. He is feeling better. He can breathe. He opened his eyes, this time with a bit more clarity in them.

"I think...I think I'm okay now."

Rai gave a curt nod, "Let's go then."

The way back, Konoe felt a muffled sense over his head. His head feels a bit Everything swept by him like a blur.

He didn't know they made it back home, but they did. He also didn't know how hard he was gripping the mask, because when he looked down, the paper mache mask was a bit bent out of shape. It was soaked with his sweat.

"About tonight," Rai started, "You can talk to me if you want. I am willing to listen."

Konoe did not return a response, his eyes were fixed on the mask he was holding.

"Don't force yourself," Rai said lastly, before handing Konoe his guiding plant.

Even though Rai said that to him, Konoe doesn't know how to react. He doesn't understand much himself either. He couldn't understand why he behaved like that back then. On the surface, there was nothing wrong with the parade even Konoe thinks so himself. However, all hell broke loose once he saw the red. That's something that even he couldn't figure out why. It just sits wrong with him.

Maybe it was the light? The crowd? The prostitutes? Or maybe the fact that even though the crowd was cheering with such a renewed energy to the actors, it still doesn't change the fact prostitution isn't a glorified job. But what's up with prostitutes? He doesn't remember seeing them, more less interacting with them. So why in the world does he feel so strongly about them?

That night, Konoe ended up tossing and turning in bed. Staring at the ceiling, tracing the beams from one end to the other, and then repeat. It took him so long to fall asleep.

Voices again.

This time they are brushing and pulling, wispy. Sometimes far, sometimes close. He tried to tune in, but they just blur out.

Then, static.

Loud static noise. It was screaming right into his ears. He couldn't hear anything but static for a while. But bit by bit, the static noise died out and was replaced by a soft crying. The crying gradually got louder. Loud. Deafening. They were crying. Begging. Begging out. Begging to be freed.

He woke up to a chilling scream of 'STOP' close, right into his ears. He looked around panicked. He heard a scream, but it was not real because his room was quiet. Dead quiet. It was all in his head. It was in his head. It was just a dream.

He pressed a hand on his chest. Deep breaths.

It was just a dream. 

He kept telling himself that. But the more he dwelled on the idea, the more restless he became. Because even if it was a dream, it doesn't sit well with him that the voices are speaking this time. Legible words.

Konoe ran out to the hallway, straight to Rai's room, with the entire intent of spilling all his worries to Rai.

He was so stuck on seeing Rai. He just needed to see that familiar face. He needed justification. He wanted Rai to tell him that everything is alright, that what he saw was just a dream.

When he arrived at Rai's door, he noticed the door was pitch black. Usually, there would be light escaping the door cracks, filtering out into the hallway, but this time there was nothing. He stared into dark emptiness, except for the faint glowing coming from behind him, from his room.

Rai was asleep.

Reality started to kick in when he realized that everyone was asleep. It is probably really late right now, and waking Rai up for something as stupid as a dream might not be a good idea.

After standing in front of Rai's door, struggling with to knock or not to knock, he cooled down. He will be another bother to the white cat. The nauseating feeling disappeared, and all that was left was exhaustion. Maybe a tad-bit stupidity. Why was he freaking out over a dream? He just heard screams. It's not a big deal. It's not real.

Konoe languidly trotted back to his own room. This time, sleep overtook him quite easily.

Hi!

I have been holding onto this chapter for weeks now because I am not happy with how it turned out. But, I've decided to just. . .screw it and move on. Because rather than getting stuck here, I'll rather progress with the story.


	5. Books

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summer is hot

Konoe woke up with a headache the following morning. It was past noon by the time he'd came to it. Inevitably, last night's memories drifted into his head. He dwelled upon them for a bit, but that just brewed some nasty emotions that he doesn't want to touch again. So he shook them off.

He offered Bardo help with the stall. The striped cat looked surprised. Konoe, later on, found out that Bardo had wanted to let Konoe off today as well because it is the final day of Spring Festival.

Konoe understood Bardo's well intentions, but he had enough of the festival. He wasn't sure if he can stand properly in those crowded environments by himself. He can't guarantee that he won't act out or do something that he'll regret. Because he knew for a fact that if he let himself out into the streets, he will freak out. It'll end up miserably.

So he said no.

He assisted Bardo with the stall. Bardo kept on giving him worried looks, but Konoe would rather not talk about it. He had no intention of telling Bardo...yet. Maybe someday. When he feels a bit more prepared. But currently, it was a big no.

Spring festival ended just like that. With a bit of sweat, shouting, giving pops and taking money. Exhaustion. Sweetness. There were a few candied fruits left at the end. Konoe helped himself to two pops. One of them was kuim too. That was a bonus.

With Spring festival coming to an end, so did the season itself. The days became longer. Heatwaves were more frequent. Cicadas were chittering angrily in the trees surrounding the inn. Every night was a battle with mosquitoes and heat. He will wake up with a soaked pillow and shirt the next morning. That was annoying. 

Summer came at him full speed. It was literally a period of sweat, heat and exasperated customers.

Cats came to drink and talk and laugh. There were more cats stopping by for drinks. The nights also seemed fuller. Many cats crashed in right after work. They said a beer after a long day of exhaustion is the way to go. Konoe wanted to try beer. He was curious. However, after just a small lick, Konoe decided it wasn't for him. The construction workers laughed, some shook their heads. They suggest Konoe to give it a larger gulp, but Konoe refused to. Beer doesn't taste good for him. He'll rather drink the herbal tea Rai treated him last time. Speaking of which, it's still a mystery to why Rai is against selling herbal tea.

Two weeks have passed since Spring Festival. It was Konoe's one month mark in Bardo's inn.

It has been around 20 days since the 1000 g post. He hasn't gone out since. He didn't want to take the risk; especially when the occasional customers still talked about his case. So all he did was help Bardo around the kitchen, occasionally clean rooms and wash sheets. Pretty uneventful.

The workload had been helpful in making Konoe not particularly remember anything. But he still catches himself thinking about it from time to time.

Rai has been consistently absent from the shop. He wondered where the white cat go. When Konoe asked Bardo about it, Bardo told him to directly ask Rai. That would be hard considering that the white cat had been absent around the shop for a while, but nonetheless, Konoe made a personal note to ask Rai the next time he see him.

Then one night, he could hear the voices very clearly. He could see the screams again. They were no longer the muffled sounds he heard a couple of nights back.

They spoke to him. Screamed in pain. Screamed in his face.

_Please, Stop! Stop!_

But this time, there were also ones that are speaking and they were spelled out clearly.

_1000 g! That's enough to buy a plot of land in Ransen!_

_No I beg you! Stop!_

_Wow, that is a lot for a damn brat._

They were overlapping one by one until they become this indistinguishable mess.

_There must be a reason why a damn brat's bounty is so high!_

_No! STOP!_

_Who knows? He might be a serial killer, you'll never know._

_NO!_

Konoe sat up straight, panting. That one last scream was practically in his ears. His ears are now ringing. Was that even a dream? Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. He couldn't think, his face is particularly heated. And it feels like something is pressing right on his forehead. It's a constant force. His head hurts.

_He might be a serial killer, you'll never know._

That line suddenly ran through his head. And it made him doubt himself. Question himself. Was he a murderer? Is that why he had such a high bounty? Doesn't that mean he should turn himself in? He is in the wrong after all. But he has no memory of killing anyone. But yet again, he has a missing gap of his memories in the first place. Why can't he remember anything?

A part of him was blaming him, a part said, let's slow down. Take a deep breath. It might not be that way. The truth's not out yet

What! It clearly is-

Konoe tossed the blanket to the side of the bed.

Stop thinking.

He stepped onto the floor.

Stop thinking.

Walked to the door.

Stop thinking.

Opened the door.

Go peel potatoes. I didn't do them yesterday. Bardo needs them tomorrow.

It is the middle of the night. He couldn't go back to sleep. So he went downstairs and peeled potatoes.

He grabbed the stool, making sure to be extra quiet. Dragged the basket of potatoes and dragged an empty basket between his legs. He peeled.

Peeled. Watched as the skin fell one by one into the basket beneath him.

It was therapeutic. It felt like his headache was going away just as the peels fell into the basket.

"What are you doing?" 

Konoe almost ran the edge of the knife through his finger. He whipped his head around to see who it was.

It was Rai. His shoulders instantly slumped.

"What are you doing?" The white cat repeated, demanding tone.

"Peeling potatoes."

“At this time?"

"I couldn't sleep, okay?" Konoe threw the skinned potato into the basket and grabbed another one. He wants Rai to get off his case. Go away please. He avoided eye contact.

"Do you want some warm milk?"

Konoe stopped.

"What?"

"Warm milk helps insomnia."

"I am fine."

Silence.

Then a sigh.

He could hear Rai's footsteps behind him. Cabinets creaked, a fire started.

The firing stove behind him warmed his back.

He looked sneakily over to the stove and saw Rai popping open a few jars. 

"You can cook?" 

"What do you think?" 

"I am surprised. You are never in the kitchen." 

Rai didn't say anything else. His movements are smooth. He dripped a few drops of something Konoe doesn't know and sprinkled something over the milk and sugar. 

The cup Konoe received was warm as expected. He gave Rai a questioning look before looking back at the white liquid in his hands. The aroma filled his nostrils, it was hard not to give it a try.

"Wow," Konoe whispered under his breath. 

Rai snorted. 

He continues to drink the milk and his dream clouded his head for a speck of a moment. He found himself frowning. 

"Rai....do you think?" Konoe trailed off and then shook his head, "...nevermind." 

"What? Just spit it out." 

Rai's gaze was hard on him. There was this instance where he felt stupid, but the longer he waited, the more he could feel Rai's anticipation and he couldn't help but tell Rai.

"Do you think I was a murderer?" 

"What?" 

"The other day, they said that it's strange for a kid to have that much....that insane amount for bounty. The only possible thing was if they were a murderer. And I don't think they are that far from it....because I don't remember anything." 

"No." 

"How can you know for sure?" 

"You aren't one," more firmly this time. 

"But you don't have proof." 

Rai rolled his eyes, "As if a clumsy stupid cat like you can be a quick-witted, cold-blooded murderer." 

Konoe bit back more self-deprecating comments. 

"That's rude," he lamely spat out. 

"Hmph." 

Konoe smiled against the rim of the cup, before emptying the contents in his mouth. 

"Thank you." 

"Go to sleep." 

After this, he didn't fall back into the scary dream.

Moreover, they sort of disappeared?

Konoe felt better. Maybe those screams aren't anything major to worry about.

Instead, his dreams turned peaceful and he started to dream about something else, something very familiar.

_"Konoe go to school."_

No, he doesn't want to. He would rather say here nestled in warmth. 

_"The kids in Karou may be rough, but they are all good kids."_

_They are far from good! Yesterday they were-_

Konoe blinked open, staring hard at the ceiling with a particular concentration and resolve. He could feel a train of reasons lining up behind him as to why Karou's cats are far from good. They are downright evil. 

The strange thing is when he tried to bring up the list, he can't. They're gone. Poof. 

Then he suddenly realized he was talking about Karou. And what is Karou?

He asked Bardo. 

"Karou? Yeah, it's a remote village in the West. They are famous for their fruits, but recently there was a drought. It was devastating." 

"Hold on lemme get a map."

"Ken go get a map."

"Bardo-san! I don't know where you put your maps. I literally just serve food."

"Tch. You're useless."

"Really now? Are you for real?"

"It's in the storage go find it."

Ken threw his hands in the air.

The map turned up and Bardo circled Karou with a pencil.

That night Konoe went to Rai.

"You are out for work?"

"What?" Rai asked directly, cutting off small talk.

"I think I know where I am from."

"Where?"

"Karou."

"That's pretty far from here."

"Can I go there?"

"It's not that you can't, more like it's too dangerous."

"So...no?" It is fine either way. It's not like it is urgent.

"Not now at least. Maybe later when I'm less busy."

"Okay."

Summer continued to bake him alive. So did boredom eventually. Being locked up in a confined space isn't all too interesting. Lately, Rai got more free time. He hung out more around the inn. So it wasn't entirely all for nothing.

"I'm bored."

"Go play with rocks or something."

"That doesn't sound fun."

Rai rolled his eyes.

"I don't have all day to please you. Find your own fun."

Rai left at midday.

So much for Rai being around more frequently. Konoe is on clothes washing duty again...fine. I'll go find my own fun.

He'll just go to the storage room. And look at props. He saw props for Winter Festival last time.

That night, a traveling cart stopped by town.

The traveling merchants stop by every month, selling a variety of things. Konoe saw a flute. 10 silvers. It's expensive, but not too bad. He bought it with the money Bardo gave him.

The merchant's son gave him an instructional manual, but the orange cat left before Konoe could ask him how to read notes. Because he can't. The manual was left untouched in one of the drawers in his room.

Then, days of ear-raping flute noises.

"Stupid cat, stop."

The flute stopped.

But it softly picked up again.

"If you really want to play it, do it outside. Your flute skills are terrible."

"Rai," Bardo warned.

"What? Isn't it true. Even the customers complain."

"It'll get better. No one starts a master."

"Hmph."

Konoe thinks he'll just play when Rai isn't around. Then the same night Rai knocked on his door.

Rai shoved a book in his hands.

"You can read right?"

Yes. He can. He isn't good at it, but he can. The moment he opened the book was the moment his eyes never left the page. The book was amazing. Absolutely mind-blowingly, godsend amazing. He couldn't peel his eyes from it. Soon he was hugging it to sleep, working with it and taking a break with it. Then as the nature of all books, it ended.

Konoe's life ended right there.

It was frustrating, the story ended abruptly, but his eyes traveled down, "to be continued," and he stared at the text.

He knocked on Rai's door.

"What do you want?"

"What does it mean, 'to be continued?'" He pointed at the text.

"There is a second volume."

Konoe gave him awe-struck eyes.

"I have it. Just give me a second, I'll get it."

He gave it to Konoe and got back Volume 1. 

For the next week, Konoe's face was practically married to the book.

IT WAS GOOD AND SAD AND FUNNY and it made Konoe shed tears! The book talked about a boy who was being talked into the dirt, but he proved himself. He went on a journey to an island on the other side of the desert to improve himself and eventually brought riches back home. He was so proud of the boy by the end of the second volume. It ended on the boy's encounter with a girl, hinting romance. He needed the third volume.

He slept that night and dreamed about the protagonist meeting the girl. They were walking in grassland, her smile was so beautiful. Blinding. Eventually, she morphed into a goddess-like cat. The goddess felt very familiar to him, it felt like he has known her for a long time. However, he could not pinpoint who the female cat was. Honestly, it has been bothering him. He is wondering if that female cat is real. Is it someone he knows? Are his dreams trying to tell him something?

Knock.

"What?"

"Do you have the third volume?"

"Of Cats and Cats? No, I don't. The library probably has it."

He went to the library. Rai is too busy to go with him. Rai gave him a cloak. It should be fine now, the billboard has been covered with other notes. No one is talking about the bounty anymore. Just don't make a scene, you should be fine. Konoe felt more than fine. He was no longer stalked by the anxiety of being discovered by his prosecutors because all he wanted was The Third Volume, Of Cats and Cats.

Konoe went to the library and found the book he was looking for. He admired the cover of the third volume, his heart was racing to see what is inside.

He sat on a nearby table and delved into the contents. Then he heard laughter.

He saw a group of young cats. They were laughing at the librarian behind them and running as the librarian struggled to keep up. They got kicked out eventually. There was a brief moment of longingness. He wonders if he can find friends like that too. But his spirits quickly went up again as he glanced back at the book. He checked out the book. He didn't know that was possible. He was happy to bring it back.

Strangely enough, when he got back, he saw the same group of young cats sitting in one of the inn's tables.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI!
> 
> I didn't realize when writing this, but man, the way I wrote Konoe's obsession with books is like obsession with drugs. It's weird.
> 
> AND I GAVE UP! I gave up trying to fill the scenes with details because I would somehow create small scenarios that make me question about their legit characters and I would go on a journey to confuse myself so I decided I'll just put as much of the story out as possible without any extra side details. It feels very empty like this and it bothers me, but I wish to show more of the story as much as possible? So I'll do that. Please excuse my messy writing.


	6. The Crew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Konoe met new friends and they went swimming in the river.

The group of young cats, three exactly, were huddled in one of the tables talking and laughing away. Konoe eyed them curiously, wondering what they were talking about. But he stared too long because one of them caught his eye. He instantly looked away. He wasn't sure why he did it, but he did.

For the next few weeks, the same three cats were seen every day. They would come early in the morning and then once more at night. Apparently, one of the cats, the female, is the daughter of a close friend of Bardo's. Konoe is not good with them. Especially that female cat. She is very chatty, outgoing and she spews out anything that crosses her mind with no filter. That is exactly why Konoe couldn't get along with her because he doesn't know how to respond to her. 

For example, there was that one time where the group was talking about quiet cats. It started with one of the group members saying that he is into quiet girls, but that cat was immediately countered by the other male who said cats who are the quietest are the creepiest ones ever.

Mei nodded her head like it is the most natural thing in the world, "Yeah, usually reserved and quiet cats have some of the strangest fetishes," she looked over to Konoe, "like Konoe."

What was that supposed to mean? Konoe smiled awkwardly and tried to laugh along. Mei would then wave her hand and say I'm just teasing you.

Okay. It's just a tease.

Then there is that other time where Mei labeled Konoe 'the neat freak' because he would wipe the same table three times.

Kaiya piped in, "I've seen it too!"

"Konoe has automysophobia," Mei sang with a mocking tone.

Konoe didn't know what to do. He just shook his head and tried to keep his burning face under control.

Bardo came in.

"Stop bullying him, he is just doing what I tell him to do. Don't tell me you guys don't wipe the tables at your home at least twice? That's basic manners. You kids lack that."

Anyway, it is not like Konoe hates Mei. He is just not good with her. Over time, he realized that he is in this constant cycle of Mei teasing him, over and over again. Soon he learned to not take it to heart, but he is still easily embarrassed.

One day, Rai and Konoe had an interaction in front of Mei, which was a first because Rai rarely talked to Konoe. It was either Konoe had a question or Konoe did something stupid that Rai couldn't help but step in. This time it was the latter. Rai rambled the usual of 'how did you mix up the ingredients? Do you have grass for brains?' It was a string of insults that Konoe grew accustomed to and he could definitely repeat it back to Rai's face.

"Stupid cat," he spat.

Mei saw that and she immediately snuck up to Konoe's side.

"Why do you let him call you stupid? You are far from it." 

Konoe looked surprised at her sudden comment.

To be honest, he doesn't know. Sometimes he wonders what will happen if he barked back at Rai, but that thought just makes him cringe. So he would go the far end of the spectrum and dive into this crisis of self-doubt, in which he'd wonder if he is actually stupid. Eventually, he'd admit that there were times he hadn't exactly done the smartest thing ever.

"Get back at him," she whispered.

Konoe shook his head, a frown hanging on his lips.

"Hmmm...." Mei gave him the look. A mischievous look, not good by any means in Konoe's dictionary.

"Hey, silver-head big bro! Why did you dye your hair silver? Are you trying to be special?"

Konoe's eyes bulged out, he grabbed Mei on the arm and looked at her as though she is crazy. Mei just laughed and gave him a lazy smile.

"This is my natural hair color."

"Really? I guess you _are_ a real snowflake." 

Rai rolled his eyes.

"Where are your friends today? You guys usually hang around like cockroaches."

"Yes, cockroaches, but cockroaches can get heat-strokes too. They are at the river. Too hot today. Your shop is like a sauna." 

Konoe's ears perked up to 'river.' He wants to go to. He hadn't realized how long he has been in the inn until now. The last time he saw a river was during the carriage ride to Ransen which was ages ago.

"Can I go too?" he asked softly all the while feeling like he was walking on tight rope.

"What do you think, stupid cat?" Rai shot him down. 

Konoe ears fell. Mei looked at Konoe's pitiful state and couldn't help herself.

"Why not? He has been working hard all day. Why can't he go out for a bit?" 

"No is no."

"I'm so glad I don't have a rock for a boss."

"Stupid brat."

"I don't want to be called that by someone who only knows how to use stupid as an insult." 

"Shitty brat."

"Feminine long hair emo, " she snapped back. 

"Foul-mouthed brat." 

"Long boots-loving freak" because Rai actually wore boots that rode to his thigh. 

She had a smirk on her face, nudging Konoe. 

"Come on, you give one too." 

Konoe glanced at Rai and the white cat returned a stoic look. Konoe has no idea if he was in the place to insult his boss. He has no idea if Rai was even expecting him to, but Mei was looking at him with anticipation in her eyes. It doesn't help that Rai was keeping quiet.

"Eye patch," he said softly. 

There was a pregnant pause between them.

Mei hollered a burst of laughter, "Oh my, are you serious? That's your best?"

Konoe's face darkened a few shades. He pushed her towards the door and told her to leave.

Okay. Okay. Mei laughed, waved her hands and left. 

Rai shook his head as he watched the girl leave the shop.

"Do you like her?" 

Konoe jumped at that question. His cheeks flushed again.

Does he like her? Maybe he does. Maybe he doesn't. The idea of falling in love feels foreign. If anything, it reminds him of the main character in Of Cats and Cats. Maybe he does. He definitely felt a pull towards her. There are times when he felt like he had to do something for her.

Konoe shrugged.

"I don't know. I do like her. But I don't know if I like, like her." 

Rai gave him an eyebrow raise and a goddamn smirk.

Konoe blushed harder. 

A week has passed and the days only got hotter. Konoe's collar was constantly soaked with sweat. This heatwave was so particularly bad that Bardo said he'll close the restaurant for the morning and open up at night. Konoe didn't put up much of a fight. He was too sluggish anyway. 

Mei pulled his arm.

"Let's go to the river!"

Mei has been going on about the river for the past week. She told him the crew's fishing trips, swimming trips, diving trips. The more she spoke about it, the more he yearned to go.

But he can't without Rai's approval, and so far, Rai denied every single request. At this point, Konoe is impressed that Mei could bring this up every day without fail. He isn't sure if she is just blatantly ignorant or optimistic.

Just when he was about to refuse, Rai stepped in and said, 'Sure, let's go. It is hot today.' Konoe couldn't process what happened until Mei pulled him again, giving him a really bright smile.

Just like that, they are going to the river — something he longed since a week ago. It is hard to believe that is happening right now because Rai was an unyielding wall. He always told Konoe that it is dangerous to wander in the forest with a bunch of kids. It's basically 'offering your ass to your enemy,' as Rai quoted it.

Kai and Dona were both by the doorway waiting for Konoe.

Of course, there are conditions. Rai has to go with him.

Konoe thought it was sort of too easy? Was the weather the only reason? He was tempted to ask Rai upfront, but that might steer the cat away and he doesn't want Rai to take back his words. So Konoe just kept his mouth shut.

They traveled to a nearby lake. The water was cool, refreshing, but still too cold to jump in. Konoe stared at the river in awe. There were so many things moving in there, especially little fish.

"Konoe!"

He looked up in response and was shocked to find out that everyone stripped their clothes. Even Mei. Mei was almost wearing nothing. Konoe blushed at the sight. She has a tight-fitting top on and a pair of undies. That was it. Is that ok? She is a girl.

Mei rushed him to take off his clothes and then practically dragged Konoe into the freezing water. His body instantly stiffened and his instincts are telling him to get out. He wanted to, but Mei was gripping so hard on his wrist.

"Mei, I can't. It's too cold. I'll just watch you guys."

He pulled his wrist free.

"Whaat? Come on. Don't be a bummer. Just stay for a few minutes. You'll get used to it," she coerced.

True to her words, he got used to the water temperature. The group started to swim towards the deeper parts of the river. This time, Konoe backed out for real. He can't swim. 

"You don't know how to swim?"

Konoe shook his head, embarrassed.

"That's fine! I can teach you! Come on!"

Konoe took a glance back at Rai for reassurance. He wished the white cat would save him out of this situation.

However, the white cat wasn't paying attention to him. In fact, he was doing warm-up exercises. Rai was planning to swim...unexpectedly. He thought Rai would watch from afar. Also, he was in his underwear. But that wasn't all. Konoe gawked at Rai's defined muscles. Rai was toned, completely different from Konoe's scrawny body. Konoe couldn't help but stare in admiration.

"Isn't he ripped?"

Konoe snapped back at Mei, blushing.

"I am jealous of him," Dona said.

"I wish I had those muscles! But working out is too much work!" Kai blurted out then splashed water towards Dona. Dona ended up chasing after Kai for revenge. The two swam further into the river, leaving Mei and Konoe alone.

Now that he thought about it, he has never seen Rai work out.

"Hey, Konoe, come!" Mei urged him over. Konoe couldn't move well, only his toes are touching the river floor. The water was deep to the point that it covered his nose.

He suddenly heard a splash behind him and when he looked over, he saw Rai swimming fast towards the center of the river. Konoe felt left behind. He wanted to swim as good as everybody.

Konoe was terrified of the idea of drowning. Mei said she's got him and that she won't drop him, but Konoe couldn't help, but grab onto Mei super tight. Maybe too tight at some point, because Mei told him to relax and let himself be carried by the water. When he removed his hand from Mei's arm, he noticed that he left red marks. He felt so sorry afterward.

As they ventured out to the open water, Konoe started to learn kick water.

"Heey! Mei! COME OVER HERE ALREADY!"

"Wait!" Mei shouted over Kai's direction.

"Can you manage it?" She spoke quickly, looking at Konoe.

"Yeah I can," Konoe said without looking up, he was too focusing kicking the water.

"Okay great! I'll be right back!"

Mei left immediately, but Konoe did not feel scared at all. In fact, Konoe found swimming fun.

A few seconds later, he heard his name. Kaiya was calling him.

He looked towards Kaiya's direction and saw Kaiya pointing at the water and then he dived in. What? Konoe followed suit and ducked under the water surface. There, he saw Mei dancing in the water. It was amazing. She was swimming so fluidly, gracefully, swimming in curves. Then in a swift motion, she did a backflip and spun herself to the surface. Konoe swam up too, kicking vertically.

"Wow! That was so cool!" Konoe blurted out as soon as he reached air.

Mei came up giggling. A beautiful flush across her cheeks. 

"Mei is awesome, right?" Dona asked him.

Konoe nodded in agreement.

"I'll teach you later when you can swim comfortably!" Mei shouted back.

Konoe nodded twice as hard.

"Konoe! I can do it too, you know!" Kaiya thumbed himself on the chest.

"Shut up Kai! I showed you how to do it!"

"So? I can do it better than you now!"

"No, you can't!"

"Oh yeah? Let's do it at the same time! Konoe be the judge!"

Konoe definitely does not feel he has the right to be the judge. Before he could refuse, the two already plummeted into the water.

Dona laughed, shaking his head and followed the two into the water. Konoe was at a loss, but he still dived down. It felt wrong to drop out and ditch his friends.

This time Konoe watched Mei with extra care, watched as she stretched out her arms and watched as she fell head back into the depths, her stomach rolled out, following the motion of her head, feet mimicking the same movements. Her body curved in a swift motion, making loops. She did it again and again, descending deeper and deeper into the water. Konoe was so amazed that he forgot about Kaiya.

When his eyes darted over to Kaiya, Konoe realized Kaiya was doing the same thing! They are both amazing! After a while of spectating, Konoe had to go back up for air. He tried staying as long as he could, but eventually, he gave in. When he returned, both Kaiya and Mei were still at it. Both pulling tricks from their sleeves like nothing.

While he had an appreciation for their skills, he was also impressed by their lung capacity. 

He looked over to Dona and he saw a smile plastered on his face. Dona was completely immersed in the two displaying their skill below them. Dona is also amazing. 

Kaiya was the first to take leave for air. Konoe looked over to Mei and saw the girl stick her tongue out and Konoe couldn't help but chuckle. Mei looked at him with a small smile and then with a determined look on her face, she proceeded to kick a larger and faster curve.

Suddenly, Mei's face twisted in pain. Konoe immediately caught on that something was wrong. Did she sprain her leg? Immediately after that thought, Mei crouched over, holding her calf. Without thinking, Konoe kicked himself over to her. He was pathetic though, his kicks are weak and erratic, he was practically not moving and Mei was sinking faster than his kicks.

Bubbles escaped her mouth. Her head was lolling back and her movements turned sluggish. This was bad. His kicks became frantic, a variety of random kicks. A deep dread pooled in his stomach as a realization set in. She was going to die.

That moment, Konoe could hear someone talking next to his ears.

He couldn't understand them.

Mei's eyes were slowly becoming muddled, losing light. The same thing happened before. It was his fault, his foolishness. Those eyes are going to turn dark again, lifeless. Dead eyes. Bone-chilling, death gripping, haunting. Dead. Eyes. He shouldn't have done that. He wasn't going to let it happen again. There is no way he is going to lose her again. Konoe had his fingers splaying out.

Then Mei's eyes close and her limbs were no longer moving and at that moment Konoe felt a chill ran down his spine. Suddenly, he was reminded of a certain cheerful cat. A cat who has the same determined look on her face all the time. She was always taking on challenges, she was optimistic, looking double, thinking double, she was so bright.

_Konoe._

A voice against the side of his ears.

But it was too late.

His vision was darkening and everything _blurs_. He was running out of breath. The depths suddenly became threateningly dark and deep, he swore the river was sucking them in.

His body became heavy. He could not move. He could not paddle. He could not kick. He watched as Mei's figure turned into a blurred splotch of blackness in his field of vision.

Light filtered into his eyes and he saw white. Blinding white. The world was spinning on a spindle. The ground was pulling him down with the utmost force.

Rai managed to drag them out of water.

Konoe dripped in wet, choked on water, ragged breathing, but even while choking he was trying his best to push himself up. His eyes fixated on Mei's cold body.

"No..." Konoe sobbed.

_Hey, Konoe I know we can do this._

"No."

_We'll leave that door. Leave it up to me._

"No! You can't!" He screamed at her face, shaking her.

_Konoe, don't make that face._

"WAKE UP!"

_Hey, Ao. . ._

"I'm so sorry! Please don't go!"

_Do you want to die with me?_

Konoe hugged her close.

The words, 'I'm sorry' were repeated over and over again. Left his lips like nothing. Trickled down like a constant stream.

_She died._

_And she is never going to return. He was so stupid. He was so stupid. What was he thinking? She was so young, so beautiful. Why did he make such a request? She is never going to come back._

_She's dead._

Everything turned black. Then he could hear soft rumblings, followed by a soft chuckle.

_"Konoe. . .don't look at me like that."_

"Mom..."

_"Just know, I do not regret giving birth to you. I. Do. Not. Have. A. Single. Regret."_

Silence.

_"You are my precious baby boy."_

_I am proud of you...._

But she left him.

Just like Grandma, just like Ao.

Mom died of sickness. How could he forget?

Everything was coming back to him.

He has a doting mother, but his father was never home. His father was always...gone. He loved his mom, but she passed away from an illness early on. His father did not want to take care of him. He was left under the care of his grandparents from his mother's side. Only his mother's side because his father did not have the decency to even show his son to his parents. The only relatives he'd known are from his mother's side. The thing was, his grandpa hated him. He kept on saying that Konoe was the one who killed his daughter because, after childbirth, she has gotten even weaker than ever before. His grandma didn't want to deal with him either, but she still has some decency to take him in and care for him. She taught Konoe how to read and write. She taught him how to garden and that her favorite flowers were chrysanthemums because they make great tea. Gradually, his Grandma came to love him. Although his grandpa hated him, he felt okay and thought he could live with it. At some point, he realized that living with his grandparents was actually the best outcome ever. But, soon his Grandpa's health deteriorates and things became _ugly_. His grandma started giving him the cold shoulder. She stopped teaching him things and said he was a bother. She stopped caring. Then she _broke_ when Grandpa passed away. She went full-on rage at him. She screamed at him. She blamed him for everything. She said it was actually his fault her daughter died and she wished Konoe never existed. And that every day she was painfully reminded of the bastard who left her daughter just by looking at Konoe's face. 

Konoe's heart _shattered_. He left. He needed to leave. Even without a place to go, he left. Luckily, Goddess Ribika listened to his prayers and a miraculous offer landed on his hands. There was a clothing factory that was willing to house him in exchange for service. They even offered a salary aside from housing. He took the offer right away and never looked back.

But the offer was fake.

It was a trap for desperate run-away's.


End file.
